Gary_John_Bishop_Unfu_k_Yourself__Get_Out_of_You

start to realize something. And that’s that many of the difficulties and
complications in your life are the direct result of expectations that you have
or have had.
We’ve been using an example of a business plan gone wrong, but, in your
own life, your failed relationships, dissatisfaction with work, and abandoned
diets can be traced right back to expectation. How many times have you said
to yourself, “This isn’t how I thought it would be”?
What about the last time you were angry with someone? Can you remember
it?
Take a moment to examine that situation, and you’ll soon realize that your
anger was a product of expectations. The gap between how it is and how it
should have been. You harbor an unspoken expectation that people in your
life will be agreeable, you expect them to tell the truth, and follow through on
any agreements you have with them. Expect, expect, expect. And when they
don’t match those expectations? Oh boy!
“This is all great and good, Mr. Scottish-man but how in the hell do I uncover
my hidden expectations?”
Easy. Pick an area of your life in which things aren’t going as well as you’d
like them to, maybe even somewhere in your life that sucks right now. Take a
pen and piece of paper and write out how that area was “supposed” to turn
out. How had you planned it?
How should have this gone? You might have to use your imagination and
sense of wonder to get in touch with how the future looked from back there.
Get in touch with the hope and positivity of that area and where it was
supposed to head. Describe it in as much detail as you can possible recall.
Next, on a separate piece of paper, write down how this area actually looks.
Again, make this an exhaustive description not just “it sucks”. Get into detail
about why it is the way it is and what you now have to deal with. How do you
feel now that this part of your life did not meet your expectations?
Now, look at both pieces of paper side by side. Your pain, anguish,
disappointment (or whatever your thing is), is greater in the areas where the
gap is widest between what you expected and what you actually have. In