27.12.2012 Views

(Scars do not appear to be cause of death –shock ... - Bad Request

(Scars do not appear to be cause of death –shock ... - Bad Request

(Scars do not appear to be cause of death –shock ... - Bad Request

SHOW MORE
SHOW LESS

Create successful ePaper yourself

Turn your PDF publications into a flip-book with our unique Google optimized e-Paper software.

The mage's jaw dropped. "My... my delectably scrumptious By<strong>to</strong>pian Fruit<br />

candy!"<br />

"That was good. Can I have a<strong>not</strong>her?"<br />

"A<strong>not</strong>her one?! A<strong>not</strong>her one?! Of all the raw, blistering nerve! What makes<br />

you think you deserve a<strong>not</strong>her candy, you unmannerly, churlish dullard?!"<br />

"I <strong>do</strong>n't deserve one, I want one. Now let's have it."<br />

"How dare you so ungraciously demand candy <strong>of</strong> me, as if it were some<br />

divine right, granted <strong>to</strong> you by the greatest <strong>of</strong> Powers! Shall I just kneel <strong>to</strong><br />

this whim <strong>of</strong> yours, o Great One? Pass my treasured candies on <strong>to</strong> your<br />

stigmata'd sacredness? Why <strong>do</strong>n't I anoint them with precious oils, have<br />

them blessed, first?" He s<strong>to</strong>mped his foot with each word: "No! No! No! I<br />

think <strong>not</strong>!"<br />

"Come on... just give me one."<br />

"I'll give you <strong>not</strong>hing! And you'll like it." He plopped a candy in his mouth for<br />

emphasis. "Mmmmmm. Soooo good." He swirled it in his mouth, his eyes<br />

closed as if he were rapt with ecstasy. "Soooooo delicious."<br />

I couldn't tell if this response was hilarious or creepy, but I wasn't going <strong>to</strong><br />

press matters <strong>to</strong> find out. "Fine, then. Forget it."<br />

"I shall! Forgotten! Forgotten it is, you scabrous, rot-brained clatter-trap!<br />

Now farewell."<br />

"But... you're a mage, correct? I was hoping you could help me..."<br />

"I care NOT, you yeasty, <strong>be</strong>ef-witted pig-nut!" His eyes bulged out he jab<strong>be</strong>d<br />

his finger at me: "Now <strong>of</strong>f with you! OFF! WITH! YOU! And <strong>do</strong> <strong>not</strong> return<br />

without <strong>be</strong>ing prepared <strong>to</strong> show the proper respect... come <strong>be</strong>aring tribute -<br />

a gift!" He suddenly drew close and whispered from the side <strong>of</strong> his mouth:<br />

"Candies or chocolate would <strong>be</strong> nice. But <strong>not</strong>hing common, mind you - bring<br />

something exotic. Now <strong>be</strong>gone!"<br />

Exotic? I knew just the place.<br />

~~~~~<br />

803

Hooray! Your file is uploaded and ready to be published.

Saved successfully!

Ooh no, something went wrong!