Betydningen av seksuell erfaring, tiltrekning og identitet for ...

absence of specific sexual scripts related to a gay sexual encounter in the
lives of these young gay men, left them to rely on public discourse on
homosexuality. Among the cultural signs and images of homosexuality
available to young Norwegian men through this discourse, most are derived
from the heterosexual domain (Middelthon, 2001). In line with Anne-Lise
Middelthon’s interpretation of the homosexual debut of young gay men as a
transferral of heterosexual scripts, one way of seeing Michael’s sexual debut
is that it is mirroring the penetration of a heterosexual intercourse. As
Middelthon (1997) also points out, a consequence of the lack of specific
homosexual scripts may be that very young gay men compensate through a
transferral of power to the more experienced partner, and/or use the script of
a heterosexual debut to guide the encounter. These strategies may have their
costs: firstly, a delegation of power to the partner might lead to unsafe sex.
Secondly, as the sign of the heterosexual debut has penetration as its
defining criterion, the appropriation of this script may lead to a premature
practising of anal penetration and risk for HIV if a condom is not used
(Middelthon, 1997).
As Michael continues his story, he describes a turning point in his life
in which his gay uncle played a significant role. In contrast to the adult gay
men with whom he had sex, his uncle contributes to expanding Michael’s
understanding of gay identities, and contributes to the detypification of the
earlier understanding of homosexuality. His uncle tells him that you can be
gay even when you are out buying your groceries, and that anal sex with
men is not the only practice defining being gay. Instead, being gay is
something that you carry with you in all situations. This core gay discourse
thus rests on an ‘essentialist’ conception of homosexuality where sex is seen
as a congenital property of individuals (Rubin, 1984/93). The notion that
there is a distinct population of individuals who ‘really’ are gay, is common
both among homosexual and heterosexual people (Sedgwick, 1990/93). In
gay politics this essentialist understanding has been important in arguing
against discrimination and denunciation (Epstein, 1987). In Michael’s story,
this way of being gay relieves him of the necessity to have anal sex to
confirm his gay identity, and positions Michael by a powerful and ‘safe’ gay
discourse linked to a traditional gay liberation movement. This second
conception of gayness is more all-embracing than the first, but as such, did
not contribute much in helping him become gay. When being gay is relevant,
and hence irrelevant, in all situations in life, sexual or not, no practice is per
se linked to the identity. This ‘essentialist’ identity in itself is important as a
basis for further developmental agency, but not important as a sexual
lifeway in his story. The essentialist discourse of identity rather contributes
– Homo? – 235