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The Gortons and Slades - Washington Secretary of State

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204 sLAde goRton: A hALf centuRy in poLitics<br />

performers, <strong>and</strong> retailers in order to pass H.R. 2911, the Blank Tape Tax,<br />

a private tax levied by an industry on consumers for the benefit <strong>of</strong> a select<br />

group within that industry.” 3<br />

Zappa had told reporters he was suspicious the hearing was merely a<br />

front for the proposed tax: “A couple <strong>of</strong> blowjobs here <strong>and</strong> there <strong>and</strong><br />

Bingo! — you get a hearing.” <strong>The</strong> major record labels wanted the bill to<br />

“whiz through a few committees before anybody smells a rat,” Zappa<br />

added, denouncing the proposal as something “whipped up like an instant<br />

pudding by <strong>The</strong> Wives <strong>of</strong> Big Brother.” 4<br />

For a man whose wife had been told by Zappa “May your shit come to<br />

life <strong>and</strong> kiss you on the face,” Gore’s remarks at the hearing struck Gorton<br />

as pathetically obsequious. “I found your statement very interesting,”<br />

Gore told Zappa, “<strong>and</strong> although I disagree with some <strong>of</strong> the statements<br />

that you make <strong>and</strong> have made on other occasions I have been a fan <strong>of</strong> your<br />

music, believe it or not. I respect you as a true original <strong>and</strong> a tremendously<br />

talented musician. . . . <strong>The</strong> proposals made by those concerned<br />

about this problem do not involve a government role <strong>of</strong> any kind whatsoever.<br />

<strong>The</strong>y are not asking for any form <strong>of</strong> censorship or regulation <strong>of</strong><br />

speech in any manner, shape, or form. What they are asking for is whether<br />

or not the music industry can show some self-restraint . . . Your suggestion<br />

<strong>of</strong> printing the lyrics on the album is a very interesting one. . . . You<br />

are very articulate <strong>and</strong> forceful.” 5<br />

<strong>The</strong>n it was Gorton’s turn: “Mr. Zappa, I am astounded at the courtesy<br />

<strong>and</strong> s<strong>of</strong>t-voiced nature <strong>of</strong> the comments <strong>of</strong> my friend, the senator from<br />

Tennessee. I can only say that I found your statement to be boorish, incredibly<br />

<strong>and</strong> insensitively insulting to the people who were here previously;<br />

that you could manage to give the first amendment <strong>of</strong> the Constitution<br />

<strong>of</strong> the United <strong>State</strong>s a bad name, if I felt that you had the slightest<br />

underst<strong>and</strong>ing <strong>of</strong> it, which I do not. You do not have the slightest underst<strong>and</strong>ing<br />

<strong>of</strong> the difference between government action <strong>and</strong> private action,<br />

<strong>and</strong> you have certainly destroyed any case you might otherwise have had<br />

with this senator. . . .”<br />

“Is this private action?” Zappa shot back. 6<br />

Gorton warned Zappa he might be held in contempt <strong>of</strong> Congress for<br />

his defiant attitude. “Go ahead Senator,” Zappa snarled. “I already hold<br />

you in contempt.” 7<br />

Zappa’s bravura performance made him a sought-after public speaker<br />

on freedom <strong>of</strong> expression. Not long before he died <strong>of</strong> prostate cancer in<br />

1993 at the age <strong>of</strong> 52, he observed, “Since 1985 I’m probably more famous<br />

for having Slade Gorton tell me I didn’t know anything about the First

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