The Biblical Role of the Pastor's wife - South African Theological ...

statistic to wives with friends in the church. The remaining respondents felt
guarded and resisted developing close friendships with female congregants.
Loneliness is a common feeling understood by many pastors’ wives. These
women, according to Somerville (2005:84), often turn to something, like sport,
shopping, food, and so on, to keep from feeling hurt or forgotten. She
recommends spending time in God’s Word and developing one’s character if
the reality of loneliness becomes overwhelming.
It cannot be overstated that women need encouragement from other
women. Wives should be free to nurture special friendships.
4.4. A Clear way Forward for Pastors’ Wives
Each wife interviewed for this research in some way or another
contradicted the ‘typical’ or traditional view of the role of the pastor’s wife.
There was no ‘typical’ or ‘idealist’ model. Each wife is a unique individual with
a unique calling and different role to play within her respective church. We will
discuss the most important similarities between the wives in this section and
recommend five areas where the pastor’s wife can seek further learning.
4.4.1. Supporting the Husband
The most evident commonality between pastors’ wives was the
determined support of their husband. They showed faithfulness to their
husband and his ministry work to which God had called him. Most wives
expressed their pride in the work their husband did and gave testimony to the
sacrifices he makes. However, wives also expressed a desire to spend more
time with their husband, sometimes feeling forgotten or too rushed to have a
proper conversation. Quality family time was very important and not easy to
achieve. This, of course, is not always limited to a family in ministry. However,
feelings of insignificance and guilt can occur because of the husband’s
involvement in ministry.
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