The Biblical Role of the Pastor's wife - South African Theological ...

show support or appreciation for the pastor, his family and the ministry of the
church. Wives also expressed a need to be accepted for who they were and
what they had to offer the church. Pastoral support is often an oversight of the
church.
Roberts (1995) in his book offers practical ways in which church
members can encourage and show support to the pastor and his family.
Dobson (2001:169) too urgently requests that the church pray for the pastor
and his family. In both this question and the previous question wives indicated
that the pastor and his family need the support and appreciation of the
congregation. Further research should be done in this area to establish
whether this is seen to be a problem in local churches so that this issue may
be addressed.
2.4.13 What particular struggles faced over the years as a pastor’s wife?
22B5q: I have had to realise that I can’t be all things to all people. The truth is
I have an audience of one – God.
23B3w: Getting too close and personally involved with people and issues
which as backfired and hurt me. I’ve learned to be cautious and know who to
trust, not to get too involved.
34D5p: The church needs to be aware of the pressures they place on the
pastor’s family. Often the children struggle with expectations of being ‘perfect’
and different to normal children. Children live in a glasshouse. Congregants
react and over react with decisions made. However, our family as a result
grew stronger through the struggles. There were heavy pressures and
expectations on the family to be examples – as if we had the only right and
proper way of doing things and were criticised if a mistake was made.
12B1s: Lack of finances – I don’t feel there is a proper salary for pastors,
there are no bonuses etc. If the church is in financial difficulty, the pastor is
either not paid or paid less. I have felt that the marriage relationship comes
last in our family, the church and its needs are of more importance than
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