Fabiola : or, The church of the catacombs - Digital Repository Services

10 TUI: TWO ,.
vinced, and IIP longed to be received into the bosom of the
Church. At times he fancied himself a member of the Church,
and, forgetting everything else in the pleasing thought, he
would be happy for a moment ; but in an instant the illusion
would vanish, and his father's cold, stern face, would rise
before him, and the rage of the will which he had never yet
dared to contradict, would appear ready to overwhelm him in
the intensity of its madness when he should discover all ; and
poor Edwin, shuddering and trembling, would hide his face in
his hands, and beg of God to give him strength to be faithful
when the fearful struggle should arrive.
Six months passed away, and Edwin felt that he could not
bear it much longer. He had never entered a Catholic church
since the memorable Christmas night, and he knew no Catholic
to whom he could speak ; but he felt that he must soon take
some decisive step. At length, after much anxious thought, he
came to the determination of writing to Father Eustace, whom
he knew, from inquiries which he had made, to be the priest
of the neighboring chapel. He briefly stated his position ;
that he had read Catholic works and was virtually convinced
of the truth of that religion ; that he was anxious to know
of all to make everything known to his father, as that gentleman,
being a member of a church which is always so loud in
its professions of liberty of conscience, could not complain of
his son's following that which his conscience pointed
out to
him to be right. Poor Father Eustace ! he little knew Mr.
Stanhope when he gave this advice ; for, with men of Mr.
Stanhope's class, liberty of conscience is all very well when it
concerns yourself, but it is a different thing when it concerns
your children, your dependents, &c. In the second place, he
pressed Edwin most earnestly to come and see him as soon as
he possibly could, as they would be able to gee their way much
clearer after a personal interview, and when they knew each
other better ; concluding by again pressing upon him to men-
tion all to his father, but assuring him that, until he did so,
his secret was perfectly safe with him. Edwin would have
given worlds to be able to follow Father Eustace's advice, and
time after time in imagination he went through the interview,
in which, after telling his father all, he was to fall upon his
neck and beg of him not to spurn him. On more than one
evening, on which Mr. Stanhope had been unusually kind to
him, Edwin actually rose to his feet to go down stairs to his
father's room to tell him all, but again the cold, stern face rose
up before him, and, groaning aloud, " O God !
O
God ! I can-
not, I dare not do it," he threw himself on a chair, and wept
as if his young and loving heart would break.
to take a decisive step, and he trembled as he contemplated it.
Several times he was about to turn back, and he even felt glad
when he experienced a difficulty in finding the house he sought.
He wavered for a moment, and was about to return, when,
ig once more down the street, his eye fell upon the cross
surmounting the gable of Father Eustace's church, and hailing
the sacred emblem, courage returned to his heart, the moment
of hesitation was over, the demon was vanquished, anil, in another
instant, he was at the dwelling of the priest, had knocked
timidly at his door, and was warmly clapped in the embrace of
him whom he sought. In a few minutes he was sitting in the
easy chair in the priest's little room, and had time to look upon
Father Eustace, who sat opposite to him. He was at first rather
.disappointed, for Father Eustace did not quite come up to the
ideas he had formed of a priest. Edwin, who, to a great extent,
had formed his notions of a priest from books and from his own
rather romantic ideas, thought Father Eustace was scarcely
pale enough, and that there was not sufficient mystery about
him ; in one word, that he was rather too matter-of-fact ; but
when he looked into the kind bright eye, and saw it glistening
with sympathy and interest, and when he listened to the pleas-
ant and encouraging voice, he forgot the romance in the reality,
and the reality was that he had found a real, true, sincere, and
kind friend.
Yes, dear Father Eustace, the grave has closed over thee now,
and thou hast gone to thy reward. Like the very best of us
when we are gone, men very seldom mention thee ; but there
more and to fulfil the will of God, but that he was entirely
dependent upon his is, at least, one heart which misses the pleasant twinkle of thy
father, whose anger he knew would be
terrible when he should discover all this, and he concluded by
begging Father Eustace to counsel and advise him what to do.
Father Eustace wrote to him immediately, advising him first
bright black eye, and the joyous gladness of thy sunny smile,
telling, as it ever did, of the overflowing goodness of thy own
great heart. There is one who never will and who never can
forget that when he came to thee, like Edwin, for advice, he
found thee a kind and prudent counsellor, and who, when he,
later on, came to thee an outcast from his home and friends,
for daring to do that which was right, found in thy dear and
gushing love that which repaid him to the full, and which
made him forget all that he had left behind. There is, at least,
one who will never forget the pride with which thou didst watch
his onward steps in the way of God one who will never ;
forget
that thy sympathy was ever deepest when his need was greatest
one ; who, so long as it shall be given him to ascend the
altar of God, will never forget thee, nor allow thy honored and
revered remembrance to pass from out his heart, but who will
cherish to the last the memory of his best and dearest friend.
Peace be with th e, dear Father Eustace.
The interview between Edwin and Father Eustace was long,
for they had much to say to each other. Edwin opened his
heart most freely to his newly-found friend, and concealed
nothing from him. Father Eustace found him perfectly well
read up in Catholic doctrine, and requiring but very little more
instruction before being in a fit state to be received into the
Church. His efforts were, therefore, principally directed to
inspiring him with courage and confidence to take the desired,
but at the same time, dreaded step. To say that Father Eustace
was at once most deeply interested in the generous, highminded
boy who had thus come to him would be superfluous.
He saw how the mighty hand of God had brought the work
about in its own mysterious way, and he determined that
nothing should be wanting on his part to perfect what had
been so happily begun ; but his open brow became clouded
CHAPTEE IX.
NEW FRIEND AND A TKUE ONE. STOLEN INTERVIEWS.
APPROACHES.
A CRISIS
ONE Sunday evening in June, when Mr. Stanhope was dining
out, Edwin set off to pay his first visit to Father Eustace. He
had dropped a line the day before, saying that he would seize
the opportunity, and begging the priest to make arrangements
that they might be and sadly thoughtful as he contemplated the difficulties to be
overcome.
Finding
perfectly private, as he was as much afraid
as ever of his father acquiring any knowledge of that in which
he was engaged.
Edwin's heart beat very fast, indeed, as he entered the street
in which Father Eustace dwelt. He felt that he was now about
that he could not prevail upon Edwin to mention
this matter to his father at present, he selected from his small,
but choice, library several works which he deemed would be
useful to his young friend, counselled him to make himself
more intimately acquainted with the Catholic religion, and
placing himself in the hands of God without reserve, to trust
to the loving Providence which "reacheth from end to end
mightily, and disposethall things sweetly, "to bring everything
to a favorable issue in its own good time. He besought him to
be fervent in prayer, that God might dispose his father to receive
the information with less anger than Edwin dreaded, mid
assuring him that he would daily remember him at the altar,
begged that he would come and see him as often as possible.
During the four months that followed, Edwin had several
stolen interviews with his friend, whom he loved more and
more. Father Eustace us urgent with him to i
step, and throw himself, unreservedly, into the arms of Pruvi-