The Humourous Poetry of the English Language

351
How nations should be ruled,
From one who from his youth has been
In such-like matters school'd;
From one who knows the art to please,
Improve and govern men--
Eh bien! Ecoutez, aux Idees,
Napoleoniennes!
To keep the mind intently fixed
On number One alone--
To look to no one's interest,
But push along your own,
Without the slightest reference
To how, or what, or when--
Eh bien! c'est la premiere Idee
Napoleonienne.
To make a friend, and use him well,
By which, of course, I mean
To use him up--until he's drain'd
Completely dry and clean
Of all that makes him useful, and
To kick him over then
Without remorse--c'est une Idee
Napoleonienne.
To sneak into a good man's house
With sham credentials penn'd--
to sneak into his heart and trust,
And seem his children's friend--
To learn his secrets, find out where
He keeps his keys--and then
To bone his spoons--c'est une Idee
Napoleonienne.
To gain your point in view--to wade
Through dirt, and slime, and blood--
To stoop to pick up what you want
Through any depth of mud.
But always in the fire to thrust
Some helpless cat's-paw, when