The Humourous Poetry of the English Language

589
INQUEST--NOT EXTRAORDINARY.
Great Bulwer's works fell on Miss Basbleu's head,
And, in a moment, lo! the maid was dead!
A jury sat, and found the verdict plain--
She died of MILK and WATER ON THE BRAIN.
DOMESTIC ECONOMY.
Said Stiggins to his wife, one day,
"We've nothing left to eat;
If things go on in this queer way,
We shan't make BOTH ENDS MEET."
The dame replied, in words discreet,
"We're not so badly fed,
If we can make but ONE end MEAT,
And make the other BREAD."
ON SEEING AN EXECUTION.
One morn, two friends before the Newgate drop,
To see a culprit throttled, chanced to stop:
"Alas!" cried one, as round in air he spun,
"That miserable wretch's RACE IS RUN."
"True," said the other, drily, "to his cost,
The race is run--but, by a NECK 'tis lost."
A VOICE, AND NOTHING ELSE.
"I wonder if Brougham thinks as much as he talks,"
Said a punster, perusing a trial:
"I vow, since his lordship was made Baron Vaux,
He's been VAUX ET PRAETEREA NIHIL!"
THE AMENDE HONORABLE.
Quoth Will, "On that young servant-maid
My heart its life-string stakes."
"Quite safe!" cries Dick, "don't be afraid--