The Humourous Poetry of the English Language

579
Death, weary of so dull a writer,
Put to his works a FINIS thus.
Oh! may the earth on him lie lighter
Than did his quartos upon us!
WRITTEN IN A YOUNG LADY'S COMMON-PLACE BOOK,
Called the "Book of Follies."
This journal of folly's an emblem of me;
But what book shall we find emblematic of thee?
Oh! shall we not say thou art LOVE'S DUODECIMO?
None can be prettier, few can be less, you know.
Such a volume in SHEETS were a volume of charms;
Or if BOUND, it should only be BOUND IN OUR ARMS!
THE RABBINICAL ORIGIN OF WOMEN.
They tell us that Woman was made of a rib
Just pick'd from a corner so snug in the side;
But the Rabbins swear to you that this is a fib,
And 't was not so at all that the sex was supplied.
For old Adam was fashion'd, the first of his kind,
With a tail like a monkey, full a yard and a span;
And when Nature cut off this appendage behind,
Why--then woman was made of the tail of the man.
If such is the tie between women and men,
The ninny who weds is a pitiful elf;
For he takes to his tail, like an idiot, again,
And makes a most damnable ape of himself!
Yet, if we may judge as the fashions prevail,
Every husband remembers the original plan,
And, knowing his wife is no more than his tail,
Why--he leaves her behind him as much as he can.
ANACREONTIQUE.