26.03.2013 Views

The Humourous Poetry of the English Language

The Humourous Poetry of the English Language

The Humourous Poetry of the English Language

SHOW MORE
SHOW LESS

Create successful ePaper yourself

Turn your PDF publications into a flip-book with our unique Google optimized e-Paper software.

662<br />

Grown old and rusted,<br />

Her biler busted,<br />

And smash'd <strong>the</strong> Excursion Train.<br />

"HER END WAS PIECES."<br />

THE TICKET OF LEAVE.<br />

[AS SUNG BY THE HOLDER, AMID A CONVIVIAL CIRCLE IN THE SLUMS.]<br />

PUNCH.<br />

Ven a prig has come to grief,<br />

He's no call for desperation;<br />

Though I'm a conwicted thief,<br />

Still I've opes <strong>of</strong> liberation.<br />

<strong>The</strong> Reverend Chapling to deceive<br />

A certain dodge and safe resource is,<br />

Whereby you gets a Ticket <strong>of</strong> Leave,<br />

And <strong>the</strong>n resumes your wicious courses.<br />

(SPOKEN.) I vos lagged, my beloved pals, on a suspicion <strong>of</strong> burglary,<br />

'ad up afore <strong>the</strong> Recorder, and got seven years' penal serwitude and<br />

'ard labor. Hand preshus 'ard labor and 'ard lines I found it at first,<br />

mind you. Vell, I says to myself, blow me! I ain't a goin' to stand<br />

this 'ere, you know: but 'taint no ass kickin' agin stone walls and<br />

iron spikes: wot I shall try and do is to gammon <strong>the</strong> parson.<br />

"Ven a prig," etc.<br />

<strong>The</strong>m parsons is so jolly green,<br />

<strong>The</strong>y're sure to trust in your conwersion,<br />

Which <strong>the</strong>y, in course, believes 'as been<br />

<strong>The</strong> consequence <strong>of</strong> <strong>the</strong>ir exertion.<br />

You shakes your 'ead, turns up your eyes,<br />

And <strong>the</strong>y takes that to be repentance;<br />

Wherein you moans, and groans, and sighs,<br />

By reason only <strong>of</strong> your sentence.<br />

(SPOKEN.) Wen in a state <strong>of</strong> wiolent prespiration smokin' 'ot from <strong>the</strong>

Hooray! Your file is uploaded and ready to be published.

Saved successfully!

Ooh no, something went wrong!