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MY BELOVED IS MINE AND I AM HIS: SELF-KNOWLEDGE IN THE ...

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and other senses, and despite whatever immediate though ephemeral gratification they<br />

may afford her flesh, they are not her Beloved and so only stoke rather than satisfy her<br />

burning love for him.<br />

Yet, Bernard suggests, this is precisely the meaning of the Bridegroom’s warning:<br />

if the Bride neglects to know herself, if she presumptuously aspires to spiritual heights<br />

before she is worthy of them, she will be compelled to abandon the inner sanctuary of her<br />

heart, go forth after her restless, wandering senses among the world of created things, and<br />

there strive to find some small consolation for her deepest yearnings in the satisfaction of<br />

her sinful, fleshly desires. By a “shameful exchange of desires,” the Bride who once was<br />

eager “to feed her exiled and pilgrim soul on holy meditations and heavenly goods, to<br />

seek the good-pleasure of God and the mysteries of his holy will, and to penetrate the<br />

heavens by her devotion” will now, abandoned by grace, have to “enslave herself to the<br />

shameful servitude of her body, obey her flesh, satisfy her stomach and palate, and beg<br />

throughout the whole world, whose form is passing away, to find some little consolation<br />

for her ever ravenous curiosity.” 99 In other words, the Bride who does not know herself<br />

will have to exchange the spiritual life for life in the flesh and labor in vain to slake her<br />

burning thirst for her Beloved by the immediate gratification of sinful desires for all that<br />

is not him. Her life in the flesh will therefore be a life of misery as well as sin, for all the<br />

99 SC 35.3 (I, 250): “Turpis mutatio studiorum, ut cui ante studii fuerat peregrinantem et exsulem<br />

animam suam sacris meditationibus, tamquam caelestibus pascere bonis, Dei beneplacitum et mysteria<br />

voluntatis eius inquirere, penetrare devotione caelos…nunc omnibus his omissis, turpi se mancipet corporis<br />

servituti ad oboediendum carni, ad satisfaciendum ventri et gulae, ad mendicandum in universa terra unde,<br />

ex ea quae praeterit mundi huius figura, suam semper famelicam curiositatem aliquatenus consoletur.”<br />

59

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