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stories 46 . It is clear in the picture that the cricketer has an aggressive
manner nevertheless I will explore anger in the ward in the next chapter.
Tracey tentatively suggested reflecting had helped her be less reliant on
the approval of others and her need “to be liked”. She suggested needing
approval stopped her from challenging others. She told me in her final
interview when discussing the picture above:
Yes that need for approval and not challenging, not standing
up for yourself, not standing up for what you really believe is right
and should be done. I remember that.
Clare: But do you think its because nurses don‟t know where to go
with that, because when you are in the midst of giving care you
don‟t think wider do you, because you haven‟t got time to think
wider?
Tracey: No. I don‟t know when I changed. I don‟t know when I
jumped from there from that needing approval and I did, because I
don‟t need approval now, I don‟t care now.
Clare: And is that maturity…?
Tracey: I don‟t know I think it‟s a developmental thing..I wonder if it
was that reflective course or education generally...(Final interview
28/6/06)
Already I have told several powerful stories about the hidden power in the
field and dysfunctional team relationships (such as Susan‘s and Jon‘s
stories in chapter 5). Taylor (2001) found changing the ward culture where
nurses felt more appreciated appeared to reduce dysfunctional nurse-
nurse relationships. However, this seems too simplistic an explanation and
negates power and group dynamics. Maria‘s story focused on accusations
of bullying which demonstrates the pull and powerful effect of the team on
the individual and how important it is to fit into the team. It is almost as
though needing approval from the team is the most important process and
I wonder if this is far more important than approval from the patient while
Maria noticed it was more important than approval from senior staff.
46 See also the Fire Inside and Wounded Nurse poems.
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