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have proposed noticing such parallel processes is part of embodying
reflexivity, alerting the nurse to transference and counter-transference
processes, aiding collegial relationships and nurse patient caring
relationships. Finally, I have used poetry as a valuable and legitimate
research process which I have not found cited in the nursing press to date.
In the following sections some new understanding of the culture of nursing
(sub-plots) is presented so that I now discuss the interrelatedness of these
significant sub-plots or key findings and their implications for practice.
From Reflection Inaction to Embodying Reflexivity
I found being a good nurse was an important embodied disposition and
tentatively suggested this was influenced by the Victorian ideal of
femininity and being a good woman. Perhaps reflective practice is a
middle class justification of its values thereby possibly disadvantaging the
working class nurses? Evans (2009) in a study on working-class girls in
higher education found these women had to balance strong family ties,
were often caught up in caring roles at home and had a strong sense of
obligation and selflessness. This reduced their aspirations while ambition
was seen by them as confrontational and selfish.
I noticed the disposition of selflessness in the ward, which I saw as a
paradox. The selflessness creates a difficult double bind for nurses
whereby stoicism and not feeling become the coping strategy learnt in the
ward and contributes to the culture of martyrdom. Mantzoukas and Jasper
(2004) reported nurses played out a power struggle game while I
described nurses unconsciously acting as victims through the drama
triangle game. Patients may be drawn into this game unconsciously
expecting to be rescued as they have less resources and power available
to them through their illness. Or they may be invited into the game by the
nurses encouraging a victim or persecutor role. Managers can also
unconsciously play this game, feeding into the aspect of the habitus and
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