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If I don’t like this, what can I do to change it?
In the storyboard in our sixth meeting, we created the picture of the female
bodybuilder who represents strength and fitness juxtaposed with the back
of a woman‘s face wearing half a policewoman‘s hat. Images and
metaphors were part of our shared reflective experience (Clarkson &
Nicolopulou 2003) however the co-inquirers did not comment and weren‘t
drawn to this image in their final interviews. Nevertheless for me, this
picture represents the constant tension deep within myself; between the
policewoman that is my critical voice (the ―silencing policeman‖ Milner
1986) who censors my thoughts and actions (or as Lois from the co-inquiry
group, called her ―the thought police―) while the bodybuilder represents my
strong powerful voice that is up for a challenge and has a sense of my
personal power.
I have noticed this critical voice reduces my ability to reflect encouraging
me to whinge rather than follow through on issues and initiate changes
while the strong voice recognises my creative strength and my political
and systemic influence within the organisation. Yet for me, these different
voices (aspects of my multiple selves) do not always work together, they
often work against my intentions reducing my effectiveness. As Alice said
in her final interview:
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