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Marcos Arroyo with his grandparents, Ángeles and Santos, on the day of his First Communion. May 2006
Photo provided by Arcadio Varona
Youth, engagement, and the wedding
In a certain way, upon finishing elementary school, twelve or thirteen years of age
marked the entrance into youth hood. One participant emphasized that in the past, girls
were very innocent. That was until 15 or 16 when they began to notice the boys.
Another one told me that at the age of 11 she had gone to the training house. Therefore,
she had lived her adolescent years very differently, especially if we compare them to the
adolescents of today. Therefore, if we mark youth hood as the time when boys begin to
notice girls and vice versa, we would have to agree that for the children of the 50s and
60s, youth hood arrived later.
Nevertheless, by speaking with the participants I realized that what marked the
end of childhood was leaving all the games permanently and beginning to take upon
responsibilities. For many girls, this meant taking the responsibility of doing some
housework, among them was caring for their younger siblings, washing the dishes,
cleaning the house, etc. For the boys, this meant beginning to go to the field with the
adults and participating in caring for the animals.
Many participants remember, with a lot of detail, when they had to help their
mothers bring water, clean the house, make sure that their siblings did not get into
mischief’s, those types of things. Another task that the girls had in the summer, when
their mother accompanied their father and brothers to the field, was to buy the food to
prepare the meals and have it ready for when they returned. These obligations seem very
large for girls of eight and ten years old, but this is how the family participated in
responsibilities. Perhaps today children extend their childhood for too long and we find
ourselves with youths that suffer when having to leave their parents house to face life. I
believe that we have gone from one extreme to another. Little by little we will find a
middle point where we will let children be children and the transition to adult life will not
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