The Supreme Doctrine - neo-alchemist

THE PRIMORDIAL ERROR
organism I am arrogant or abashed before the Not-Self, but without
consciously feeling in these attitudes a judgment of myself; I have the
conscious impression that I no longer exact anything from myself, that my
exigence is turned uniquely towards the outside world. Nevertheless, as we
can understand, my exigence that the outside world admits is only the
expression of my subterranean primordial exigence in seeking to triumph
over the world. There lies the fundamental claim, the first personal
manifestation of my universal Identity with the Absolute Principle, and so the
first egotistical dualistic error, the 'original sin'. One can see the importance
of the point that we touch on here; we are at the very root of this Ignorance
from which flows all our illusory distress.
Let us analyse in detail the situation created by this primordial training.
The horse desires to feel himself affirmed in his opposition to the outside
world. The rider exacts from the horse that he succeed in feeling himself
always affirmed. It can appear at first that horse and rider tend thus towards
the same end. In reality it is quite the contrary; the nature of their respective
tendencies and the orientation of these tendencies are radically opposed.
The nature of the horse's tendency is relative; the horse belongs to the
plane of manifestation, to the relative plane of phenomena; he desires to feel
himself affirmed as much as possible, not without limits, for the limitless is
not in his domain. He prefers affirmation, but supports negation and adapts
himself to it as best he can. Besides the desire of the horse is oriented towards
the outer world; the horse desires such and such an object that belongs to the
Not-Self.
The nature of the tendency of the rider is absolute; my identity, in the
Unconscious, with Buddha-the-Absolute, engenders in my subconsciousness,
not a relative desire that my Self triumph over the Not-Self but an absolute
exigence that it shall do so. My rider is the representative of the Self, of the
Absolute Principle of only being; however ignorant my consciousness may
be in fact, my rider is none the less the representative in me of the Absolute
Self; the independence of my intelligence, however incompletely manifested
it may be, is none the less absolute by nature. Directly issuing from the
Absolute and representing it, my rider is therefore, in the temporal plane, like
a mathematical infinity which multiplies everything by an unlimited
coefficient; the absolute exigence of the rider towards the horse is manifested
by an unlimited claim, that is it has power to mobilise in my organism all the
energies that are available at each moment. Therefore the absolute nature of
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