Suckers - J.A. Konrath

He launched himself at me, screaming and drooling insanely, his probably very sharp
cleaver raised for the killing blow.
Then Lieutenant Jackie Daniels shot him in the head.
Chapter 14
“You’re an idiot, McGlade,” Jackie said, using the cleaver to cut away the ropes.
Carl was dead on the floor. He was finally with his wife. Because she was dead on the floor
too. Jack had made me sit there until the Crime Scene Unit arrived, taking pictures and gathering
evidence. They cut the bodies down before they freed me.
“So how did you know I was here?” I asked.
Jack wore a short skirt and heels that probably cost a fortune but still looked kind of slutty,
just how I liked them.
“Norma Cauldridge,” she said.
“Who?”
“George Cauldridge’s wife.”
“Who?”
“She called me, wanted me to arrest you for trying to poison her. I asked where you were,
and she said probably here. After we nabbed those necrophiliacs at the cemetery last night, I
needed to find you anyway to get your statement. Lucky I heard your girlish screams which gave
me probable cause to bust in here without a warrant.”
I wasn’t listening, because it sounded like a boring infodump.
“Can I give you my statement tomorrow?” I asked. “I gotta take a monster dump. I had some
hot dogs earlier that are going to look better coming out than going in.”
Jackie leaned in close. I braced myself for the kiss. It didn’t come.
“Did you give Norma a bottle full of your urine and tell her it was apple juice?”
“Maybe. Did she drink any?”
“She said the second glass went down rough. She’s going to sue you, McGlade.”
“She can take a number. Seriously. I’ve got one of those number things. I swiped it from the
deli.” I grinned. “You can come over later, and watch me cut the cheese. You know you want
to.”
“I’d rather gouge out my own eyes with forks.”
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