Suckers - J.A. Konrath

Roger?"
"Not me!" said Becky.
"Not me either!" said Theresa.
"I haven't! I haven't!" Kyle pitched in.
"He's not hiding in the van?" I asked them. "Maybe under your feet?"
"No way!" said Becky.
"Are you suuuuuuuuuure?"
"Yes way!"
"Seriously, Andrew," said Becky's mom, "we didn't see him come out of the house. Do you
think he's okay?"
"Yeah, he's fine," I muttered. "We should just leave him here."
"Yeah, leave him! Leave him!" proclaimed Becky, while my own children giggled.
"No, no, we're not going to leave him," I said. "We'll just wait for him to come out by
himself. Boy, will he feel dumb."
"Is everyone up for another game?" asked Becky's mom. At the children's vigorous assent,
she began. "I spy, with my little eye..."
* * *
Ten minutes later, Roger still hadn't come out of the Taywood house, and I was concerned.
Yeah, he was sometimes obnoxious, and immature, and had an almost religious dedication to
being a smart-ass, but he really wasn't prone to these kinds of pranks. Even if it had only been
the two of us, it would have been out of character to drag it out this long, but with the children
present it was just plain mean-spirited. Sure, I was talking it up like it was a big game, but if I
hadn't been doing so Theresa and Kyle would've been worried sick.
"It's Kyle's butt!" said Becky.
"That was my next guess!" Theresa insisted.
"Becky! That's not very nice! You apologize to him!" said her mother, in that Scolding
Parent voice I've never quite been able to perfect.
"All right, I'm going back inside," I decided. "I'll give him one last chance to come out."
"What if he doesn't?" asked Becky's mom.
"I don't know yet. I'll be back in five minutes, tops."
I returned to the house and stepped into the living room, which was still empty. Once again I
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