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270 SNAKES IN SUITS
process, the targets themselves seemed to unwittingly share a parallel
response pattern. In this chapter, we will attempt to outline the
development of the psychopath-victim relationship in such a way as
to enlighten the reader to traps and pitfalls along the path. We believe
the best defense against the dark art of psychopathic manipulation
is to fully understand how psychopaths operate and to take
every opportunity to avoid them.
1. Learn All You Can About Psychopathy
In chapter 3, we described psychopathic traits and characteristics in
some detail. We believe that the best defense against psychopathic
manipulation is to learn all you can about psychopaths and their nature.
While even experts are sometimes fooled, improving your ability
to see past their “mask of normalcy” is crucial to your ability to
resist their machinations. And knowing how to recognize and interpret
their true motives may help you make the decision to distance
yourself from them.
2. Avoid Labeling Someone a Psychopath
You should resist the temptation to label someone a psychopath,
especially if you are not formally trained and qualified to conduct
psychological assessments. The term itself has many negative
connotations—some of which may not apply to the individual in
question—and once used has a tendency to stick. Careless or inappropriate
application of the label would be unfair and might lead to
litigation and other forms of retaliation. For most practical purposes,
it is sufficient to be aware that a given individual appears to have
many of the traits and behaviors that define psychopathy. Trying to
“psychoanalyze,” redeem, or change one of these individuals is a
“mug’s game” you cannot hope to win.