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Psychopathic Manipulation
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who would marry to become Cathy Trask, the madam in Steinbeck’s
novel East of Eden.
Cathy learned when she was very young that sexuality
with all its attendant yearnings and pains, jealousies and
taboos, is the most disturbing impulse humans have. And
in that day it was even more disturbing than it is now, because
the subject was unmentionable and unmentioned.
Everyone concealed that little hell in himself, while publicly
pretending it did not exist—and when he was caught
up in it he was completely helpless. Cathy learned that by
manipulation and use of this one part of people she could
gain and keep power over nearly anyone. It was at once a
weapon and a threat. It was irresistible. And since the
blind helplessness seems never to have fallen on Cathy, it
is probable that she had very little of the impulse herself
and indeed felt a contempt for those who did. And when
you think of it in one way, she was right.
When the psychopath convinces us that he or she understands
and accepts our weaknesses and personal flaws, then we begin to believe
in the potential of the relationship to go further; we believe
this person will be a true friend. True friends, of course, share
information—often intimate information—about themselves with
each other. Relationships develop and mature as people share more
and more of their private lives with their partners, including their inner
desires, hopes, and dreams. Some of it is personal, other topics
are mundane, but all of it is relevant to manufacturing a picture that
fulfills our deep psychological needs and expectations. The psychopath
is all too ready and willing to fulfill these needs. Because a
psychopath—our new true friend—is an excellent communicator; he
or she easily picks out topics that are important to us and reflects
sympathetic points of view, sometimes complete with enthusiasm or
“emotion” to reinforce the spoken words. The psychopath uses glib
verbal and social skills to build a firm reputation in your mind—one