Brianna Wiest - The Mountain Is You_ Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery (2020)

THE MOUNTAIN IS YOU
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In the healing process, suppressing and controlling can
seem like a fine line.
When someone cuts you off in traffic and you choose not
to yell out your window, are you suppressing how you feel
or controlling it? If your partner says yet another idiotic
thing and you choose not to respond to it, are you suppressing
how you feel or controlling it? If your coworker
aggravates you consistently about a project and you choose
not to say anything, are you suppressing how you feel or
controlling it?
SUPPRESSING IS UNCONSCIOUS; CONTROLLING IS
CONSCIOUS.
Suppressed emotions function similarly to unconscious
biases. One such type of bias is confirmation bias,
wherein your brain sorts through stimuli to bring your
attention to facts or experiences that support what you
already believe. Though you’re not aware of the bias, it’s
still affecting you.
On the other hand, controlling your emotions involves
becoming more conscious of how you feel. You are aware
that you are angry, sad, or aggrieved, but you are choosing
what you do about it. It is not really that you are controlling
your emotions, but your behavior.
When you are suppressing your emotions, you don’t know
how you feel and your behavior seems out of control.