Brianna Wiest - The Mountain Is You_ Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery (2020)

230 BRIANNA WIEST
to trying too hard to feel good. (It is, after all, something
you have to allow.)
When you’re struggling, the most insulting and difficult
thing that someone can tell you is to “just relax” or “just
enjoy yourself.” When you’re in survival mode, the last
thing you can possibly think about is just sitting back
and rolling with the punches. This is the most important
part of learning how to enjoy your life again: When
you’re in a place of trauma and pain, you can’t try to
force yourself to be happy. First, you have to step back
into neutral.
When you’re struggling and you try to make yourself feel
good, you are actually intensifying the polarity of your
feelings. You are shoving the “bad” feeling down in place
of trying to feel something different. Ironically, many
people who struggle emotionally are, at their core, people
who actually just have a greater desire to enjoy life.
STOP TRYING TO BE HAPPY
Happiness is not something you can chase. It is something
you have to allow. This likely will come as a surprise
to many people, as the world is so adamant about everything
from positive psychology to motivational Pinterest
boards. But happiness is not something you can coach
yourself into.