Brianna Wiest - The Mountain Is You_ Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery (2020)

232 BRIANNA WIEST
STOP TRYING TO ASSERT DOMINANCE
In his book on Hygge, the Danish art of coziness and
well-being that many attribute to the nation’s staggeringly
high happiness rates, Meik Wiking explains that connecting
with others is not just spending time with them; it
has to do with not trying to dominate, impress, or create
an emotional reaction in someone. 23 You find a lot more
happiness by not trying to prove yourself.
People who want and need to assert their dominance in
relationships are the ones who are always in arguments
over hypothetical things, creating drama at important
holidays or events, or otherwise finding that the very people
they are supposed to love and cherish most receive the
worst of their behavior.
In order to find greater happiness, you need to see yourself as
an equal to those around you. When you view yourself in a
position to constantly learn from all those you know, you are
no longer compensating for fearing you are “beneath” them.
LEAN INTO THE LITTLE JOYS WHEN YOU FIND THEM
When we think of trying to “enjoy” life, it’s common for
our minds to jump to trying to achieve things that are
huge, overwhelming highs. We think that being happy is
only what happens when we’re on vacation or just landed
a huge bonus.