Brianna Wiest - The Mountain Is You_ Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery (2020)

THE MOUNTAIN IS YOU
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so we can justify our own course of action. Instead of this,
we can see what we’d also like to create.
RESENTMENT
When we resent people, it is often because they did not live
up to the expectation of them that we had in our minds.
Resentment in some ways is like a projected regret. Instead
of trying to show us what we should change, it
seems to want to tell us what other people should change.
However, other people are under no obligation to live up
to our ideas of them. In fact, our only problem is that we
have an unrealistic expectation that someone was meant
to be exactly as we think they should or love us exactly as
we imagined they would.
When we are faced with resentment, what we instead
must do is reinvent our image of those around us or those
we have perceived as having wronged us. Other people are
not here to love us perfectly; they are here to teach us lessons
to show us how to love them—and ourselves—better.
When we release the ideas we have about who they should
be, we can see them for who they are and the role they are
meant to play in our lives. Instead of focusing on how they
should change, we can focus instead on what we can learn.