volume one IN THE D U D L E Y C L A R K - Ohio Vine Tours

More documents

Recommendations

Info

Ever since they were little boys, he and Rick the Asshole have lived in Seattle. Their parents claimed they moved here to open a bar. But, like everything else they tried, that plan, if it ever actually existed, fell through. Everything always fell through for Roy’s parents. Except making babies. They were good at that. Roy has been assured that he has many brothers and sisters scattered across America, but he only knows Rick the Asshole, who is younger by eight years. Still, knowing his parents, he feels sure there must be others. Perhaps dozens. It’s hard to know for sure, since he hasn’t seen his parents in such a long time. Years and years. They up and left one bright April morn. Left him and his little brother to fend for themselves. Before they left they said all sorts of nice things, like—: We love you! Be back soon, sweeties! We’ll send money, honnies! See you later, ’gators! Good luck, schmucks! Roy and Rick had been thirteen and five, respectively. Roy, as the older brother, should have taken the lead and been the boss—but Rick had taken after his pa, and was a freak. He was smoking at six and fucking at eight. He was banging his head and tattooed by nine. At ten he was pretty much fullgrown. And, since he knew more about how the world worked than Roy, it just seemed natural he should take charge of their affairs. And it was probably a good thing, too. If it had been left up to Roy, God knows where they would be now. Probably milk truck drivers. No—Rick was a hustler, wasn’t about to sit still for anybody’s shit, especially his brother’s. He wasn’t going to toe lines, pay dues, suck up to The Man. To Rick, Roy was a dweasel—a dweeb. Passive motherfuckinpansy. So, it was a good thing Rick took charge. But it was Roy who got them into window washing. Roy, who stumbled through life looking at his feet, also occasionally looked up. Oftentimes, while sitting cross-legged on street corners waiting for someone to drop coins into his Starbucks cup, he would stare up at little dots hanging off sides of tall buildings, little dots that were, in actuality, window washers. And he would think, as he 1 ROY ROGERS IN THE 21ST CENTURY
watched them hanging there, what a wonderful, unobstructed view of the city they must have. He also thought that hanging off sides of buildings must make a lot of money. And he wondered how could someone like him get a job doing something like that? Turned out, it was pretty easy. Strangely, not everyone wanted to be a window washer. Nor even admired them. Being a window washer was how Roy discovered he was terrified of heights. squeak Roy has reached a decision. He stands. He lifts the stained mattress. Dropping to his right knee, he sticks the wad of cash between box springs and mattress, sticks his arm far in the back, far as he can reach, all the way up to his shoulder. Then he releases the cash, removes his arm, drops the mattress, and pats it back in place. He sits down again. squeak No one would ever think to look for it there. ROY ROGERS IN THE 21ST CENTURY 1
Page 1 and 2: volume one ROY ROGERS IN THE TWENTY
Page 3 and 4: What readers are saying... “Defin
Page 7: THE DEDICATION For her forbearance
Page 11: THE OPENING QUOTATION I’ve labore
Page 15 and 16: THE RED FOR RENT sign stops him dea
Page 17 and 18: The Old Cowboy didn’t know the na
Page 19 and 20: ROY’S KNUCKLES TAP gently upon th
Page 21 and 22: duties of her office demand, or the
Page 23 and 24: The Old Cowboy could rest now. His
Page 25 and 26: ROY DROPS HIS DUFFLE, and causes hi
Page 27: For, Roy is a window washer. He cou
Page 31 and 32: RAIN PELTS the windowpanes. Tears f
Page 33 and 34: ROY ROGERS IN THE 21ST CENTURY 1
Page 35 and 36: The Old Cowboy rose before the sun,
Page 37 and 38: BLUE, BLUE SKY. White, white clouds
Page 39 and 40: cry. His ears fill with Rick’s ca
Page 41 and 42: A WATERY BLUE, BLEARY blue, bleary
Page 43 and 44: approach of footsteps, or the slam
Page 45 and 46: two letters. They appear to have be
Page 47 and 48: ROY LOVES HIS MUSIC. It is the sust
Page 49 and 50: WAILING WALL is a downtown music st
Page 51 and 52: to the right of his navel, and bene
Page 53 and 54: man’s Frank Zappa mustache before
Page 55 and 56: “You make me come after your hair
Page 57 and 58: There were times when the Old Cowbo
Page 59 and 60: GEORGETOWN WAS NOT always hemmed in
Page 61 and 62: ackfired and Georgetown became even
Page 63 and 64: THE SONY TAPE PLAYER attached to Ro
Page 65 and 66: fans. Maybe, this being his later l
Page 67 and 68: A prime number, and one he’s happ
Page 69 and 70: BLUE LIGHT FROM a cloud-eclipsed mo
Page 71 and 72: GROGGY, GRAY, GROANING Roy rises fr
Page 73 and 74: feathered nether regions of their a
Page 75 and 76: FOR ROY, moving into the Outside Wo
Page 77 and 78: Roy may well be the perfected incar
Page 79 and 80:
Crouched on an outcrop of granite,
Page 81 and 82:
ROY’S PLAN IS SIMPLE, almost of n
Page 83 and 84:
Especially Rick the Asshole, and so
Page 85 and 86:
sense. And that doesn’t happen a
Page 87 and 88:
He pulls the cord and stands up. Ro
Page 89 and 90:
underwear. It’s a regular place f
Page 91 and 92:
asement. Ammonia fumes from years a
Page 93 and 94:
Her big eyes shimmer. “Sh. He mig
Page 95 and 96:
“S-Sure.” “Will that be all f
Page 97 and 98:
He’s already bought the groceries
Page 99 and 100:
The living room is swell. Real neat
Page 101 and 102:
Mel pouts. “Hey, you’re not Bra
Page 103 and 104:
Meanwhile, far across the kitchen,
Page 105 and 106:
ROY ROGERS IN THE 21ST CENTURY 1
Page 107 and 108:
The Old Cowboy rode down the bluff,
Page 109 and 110:
“TWO SHORT SKINNY mochas—shock
Page 111 and 112:
These two men—from such polarized
Page 113 and 114:
This has never happened before. Roy
Page 115 and 116:
also has a head of frothy, brown cu
Page 117 and 118:
outstretched hand. She has had enou
Page 119 and 120:
MIST PREVAILS in Seattle throughout
Page 121 and 122:
thumpthumpthump Not far from the he
Page 123 and 124:
when they see one, so that should b
Page 125 and 126:
ROY’S EYES POP OPEN. He had been
Page 127 and 128:
The man inside 28/RR took the bait!
Page 129 and 130:
accordance with the Lavese Las Mano
Page 131 and 132:
The Old Cowboy looked down on the t
Page 133 and 134:
ROY STANDS BEFORE 28/RR, right hand
Page 135 and 136:
Doughy clouds thicken with light. M
Page 137 and 138:
And here’s how it happened… FLA
Page 139 and 140:
him and it uses his name. He places
Page 141 and 142:
stair are more likely to become fri
Page 143 and 144:
The guy turns and glares. And, for
Page 145 and 146:
something that vaguely haunts him f
Page 147 and 148:
the song had sounded so much nicer
Page 149 and 150:
notice what everyone else on the si
Page 151 and 152:
A tumbleweed tumbles weedily. Off i
Page 153 and 154:
taught to do this at the secret Bar
Page 155 and 156:
promises that one day they, too, sh
Page 157 and 158:
Roy’s decision to go home may see
Page 159 and 160:
“CLICK” Roy Stands before 28/RR
Page 161 and 162:
Does Roy lower his hand and slink a
Page 163 and 164:
The strawberry roan nodded and snor
Page 165 and 166:
THE OCCUPANT OF 2 /RR, bless him, m
Page 167 and 168:
his shoulders. It seems like a coup
Page 169 and 170:
Best not to annoy the bald dude. Mi
Page 171 and 172:
He takes a breath, licks his lips a
Page 173 and 174:
fisherman trying to land a fish too
Page 175 and 176:
ROY’S BRAIN has a remarkable memo
Page 177 and 178:
the Odd Duck Club, a short-lived mu
Page 179 and 180:
general public, they almost made it
Page 181 and 182:
hosed it all away, washed it down h
Page 183 and 184:
o-lay-dee-o-day-lay-de-o-day-lay-de
Page 185 and 186:
The Old Cowboy wrapped the reins on
Page 187 and 188:
The other hands at the bar returned
Page 189 and 190:
“I dint come in here for no troub
Page 191 and 192:
WHEN DAWN COMES to the quartzite sk
Page 193 and 194:
into Lake Washington. They get shot
Page 195 and 196:
Old Guy backs up a bit—his gun ne
Page 197 and 198:
Finally, besides blinking, Roy can
Page 199 and 200:
Like a piece of origami, Old Guy’
Page 201 and 202:
Young Guy nods. “Yeah, sure.” O
Page 203 and 204:
Old Guy keeps on smiling. He stands
Page 205 and 206:
The stuff Old Guy’s offering isn
Page 207 and 208:
“Yodel yodel yeah hee ay.” Did
Page 209 and 210:
Roy leans forward, elbows on knees.
Page 211 and 212:
ROY MAKES it. Afterwards, he makes
Page 213 and 214:
He squares his shoulders. He opens
Page 215 and 216:
Mel flutters and flutes. “He not
Page 217 and 218:
The Old Cowboy dropped his scarred
Page 219 and 220:
darkness, his mother and brother wo
Page 221 and 222:
ROY WORRIES the loose change in his
Page 223 and 224:
to leotards, from hair spiked to ha
Page 225 and 226:
And leads him to a far-off, seldom
Page 227 and 228:
ecause he buys a CD player. It’s
Page 229 and 230:
It’s too late to turn tail now. H
Page 231 and 232:
Roy moistens his lips. The image of
Page 233 and 234:
“You won’t regret it.” Roy pr
Page 235 and 236:
“With tax, it comes to $188.97.
Page 237 and 238:
“What’s this so-called friend
Page 239 and 240:
Rick closes the blade and chuckles.
Page 241 and 242:
Her name was Mathilde Oliphante Dou
Page 243 and 244:
Since this was principally cattle c
Page 245 and 246:
“GO ON, ROY—DRAW!” Roy finds
Page 247 and 248:
He tries to focus on Pete’s gun h
Page 249 and 250:
“Let’s try somethin’ differen
Page 251 and 252:
Pete rewinds the movie. “First—
Page 253 and 254:
It is what o’time in the whenever
Page 255 and 256:
Pete nudges. Holds out the joint. S
Page 257 and 258:
did. With the exception, of course,
Page 259 and 260:
At thirteen, he stood tall and broa
Page 261 and 262:
she knew was she needed her loved o
Page 263 and 264:
“RAOUL WALSH is where we’ll sta
Page 265 and 266:
theatre was about to invest in 70mm
Page 267 and 268:
“When we gonna watch that?” “
Page 269 and 270:
That would be rude. But it’s what
Page 271 and 272:
Sorrow followed like an old scoldin
Page 273 and 274:
Wilson, a bilious-appearing man, lo
Page 275 and 276:
“THE SONS FIRST appeared in a 193
Page 277 and 278:
His own, personal joint. Imagine th
Page 279 and 280:
Judge Roy Bean will never leave the
Page 281 and 282:
“You got the look of a man whose
Page 283 and 284:
“SERGEANT WESTON!” “Suh!”
Page 285 and 286:
squeak He is still dressed, having
Page 287 and 288:
“Yeah.” Rick’s eyes narrow.
Page 289 and 290:
“And, fuckin’ A—I’m not you
Page 291 and 292:
“That is, if he had any—haha.
Page 293 and 294:
From beneath the shadow cast by his
Page 295 and 296:
“No, sir.” “Very well. You li
Page 297 and 298:
“ROY ROGERS was th’ real deal.
Page 299 and 300:
Her eyes, like the sky, start to mi
Page 301 and 302:
Pete mixes runny eggs with hash bro
Page 303 and 304:
Watching Pete unzip the pouch, Roy
Page 305 and 306:
“What’s eatin’ you?” Roy sh
Page 307 and 308:
From Ft. Belknap, on their journey
Page 309 and 310:
The Young Cowboy, with a look to hi
Page 311 and 312:
A BUG-EYED black boy opens the pick
Page 313 and 314:
hairs from his ears. Not all mind y
Page 315 and 316:
He studies Pete from head to toe.
Page 317 and 318:
Mel holds erect the selfsame, still
Page 319 and 320:
daddy wasn’t drunk and beating on
Page 321 and 322:
“Where’s the wine? You drink it
Page 323 and 324:
dread “—I told you to bring des
Page 325 and 326:
lobbied by lower thoughts, swell ch
Page 327 and 328:
Pete snorts. “Or Tom Mix, Gene Au
Page 329 and 330:
Pete slides his chair out from unde
Page 331 and 332:
“You!” Pete turns and stares at
Page 333 and 334:
Roy squeezes his eyes together. Col
Page 335 and 336:
THE END OF VOLUME ONE ROY ROGERS IN
Page 337 and 338:
ROY ROGERS IN THE 21ST CENTURY 2
Page 339 and 340:
THE ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Blue Shadows o
Page 341 and 342:
FROM VOLUME TWO Sentimental? Is Roy
show all

volume one IN THE D U D L E Y C L A R K - Ohio Vine Tours

Create successful ePaper yourself

Delete template?

Save as template?