Licking the Razor's Edge (2015)

Addiction #17 – Freedom from TALKING
“It is not enough for language to have clarity and content … It must also have a noble
purpose and an caring imperative. Otherwise from such hollow language we descend to
idle chatter, from idle chatter to inane babble, and from inane babble to cool distance
and frigid separation.” ~ inspired by Rene Daumal
Researchers at Ohio State University have found that people today crave appreciation
more than food, drinking, money and even sex … suggesting something of a self-esteem
addiction; an addiction often slaked with hollow communication & meaningless chatter.
We humans are social animals, and as such, we instinctively crave not only contact with
others, but to be recognized and accepted by them as well. Consequently, many of us use
banal conversation as a way to connect with others when we feel lonely &/or
disconnected from our True Selves; using the attention of others to gain a sense of selfapproval
in those times when we do not approve of ourselves. Essentially, we often speak
not to communicate with others, but rather merely to be heard by them.
We do so whenever we speak not to share an experience, but rather to entertain others or
amuse them. We do so whenever we speak not to discuss an idea, but rather to convince
others that our particular position is correct. We do so whenever we speak not to
courageously relay our personal Truths, but rather to show others that we “fit in”; to gain
their approval; to hold onto our “friends”.
In these ways, our talking has become a tool used to soothe our own fears &/or to
manipulate the unease of others … In these ways, our talking has become an addiction.
“What is the name of the 12-Step program for folks who talk a lot?
… On & On Anon.” ~ unknown
REDISCOVERING WHERE YOU ARE ADDICTED
I would venture to say that no one reading this chapter is immune from this addiction,
and yet you can provide yourself with a bit more perspective on the matter by considering
the following questions:
*Do you interrupt others when you have something “important” to say?
*Do you think about your response to a person’s story or statement before they are
finished sharing the same?
*Do you find yourself “one-upping” the funny or bizarre stories of others?
*Do you talk frequently about the weather, how busy you are, or how tired you are?
*Do you discuss politics or politicians more than once a week?
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