Licking the Razor's Edge (2015)

In everything we do, it is the “why” behind the “what” that matters. And nowhere is this
more true than when speaking about sex …
So how do you do this?
How do we make our sex into Love-Making?
TIP #01 – CHOOSE TO LOVE
This one sounds a bit ridiculous at first, and yet it is by far the most important tip of all.
Indeed, if you can get this one down, than all those that follow become essentially
superfluous. Simply stated, it is imperative that you choose to LOVE your partner* –
period. Note that I did not say “feel Love for your partner”. I said choose to actively and
consciously extend Love to your partner. And all that is required to do so is to affirm to
yourself consciously before having sex that you are going to do so solely for the benefit
of your Beloved. You know, of course, that you will feel pleasure as well, and yet you
remind yourself that your own pleasure is not why you are having sex. Even if you are
feeling extremely desirous of your partner, be sure to take just one second beforehand to
remember what Lovemaking is truly all about.
*Some of us do not have sexual partners at the moment (and a few of us never will), and yet that
does not stop most of us from experiencing the pleasures of sexual release. Most studies show
that over 96% of all men and around 90% of all women masturbate regularly. Even though doing
so is not nearly as psychologically detrimental as an actual act of causal sexual intercourse,
having degrading or lustful thoughts while masturbating does indeed bring with it the
consequences of emotional numbness. As such, if you choose to engage this option, it is worth it
to Purpose-fully engage a fantasy that is Loving & Kind & respect-full.
TIP #02 – RETURN TO THE MOMENT
No matter how intense sex gets, it is always possible to pause for a few seconds and
remember where you are and with whom you are sharing yourself.
TIP #03 – SLOW DOWN
I realize that we are all programmed to want “a good romp” every now and then (some of
us a bit more often than that), and yet making the transition from the casual sex that is
damaging your sense of Inner Peace to the Love-Making that will have that Peace return
to you requires that you be fully aware of who you are with at the time.
Human consciousness is by nature scattered and fleeting – we tend to perform most of
our actions on some level of “auto-pilot”, and when we do choose to focus on anything, it
is very difficult for us to maintain that focus before then being tempted to refocus
elsewhere. As such, it is necessary during Love-Making (especially when things get a bit
“rambunctious”) to regularly & purposefully slow down any act in order to be fully
conscious of it.
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