GURDJIEFF, G.I. â Life is real only then, when I am - Integral Book

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what Mr. Gurdjieff has said here in the general meetings and toindividual members of our group about me and my activity exactlycorrespond to my inner conviction."Many times did I intend, myself, to put a stop to such a doublemanifestation of myself, but various life circumstances constantlyprevented me from setting out to do so with the requisite decisiveness."Having received from him now," he continued, "at first glance anabsurd proposal, but knowing the habit of my Teacher 'always to keepdeep thoughts under ordinary so to say meaningless outer expressions,'I, having thought only a moment, clearly understood that if I do notprofit from the opportunity to rid myself now forever of such, as Ishould say, 'double-dealing' of mine, I should never be able to do itagain."I decided therefore to begin by signing the obligation required byMr. Gurdjieff, and at the same time I give my word in your presencethat, from this moment on, I shall not have any further communicationeither with any of the members of the former group, or even with myformer self, on the grounds of the former conditions of mutual relationsand influences."I wish very much, of course if Mr. Gurdjieff permits, to becomefrom this day an ordinary member of this now reorganized new group."Such a philosophizing of Mr. Orage made such a strong impressionon me and produced such a strange reaction in my peculiar psyche thatnow, even with the strongest desire, I cannot refrain from relating thisand describing in the style of my former teacher, now almost a Saint,Mullah Nassr Eddin, the surroundings and the conditions in whichproceeded the process of assimilation in my Being of the so to say"tzimmes" of the above-mentioned philosophizing of my dear "Anglo-
American délicatesse Mr. Orage, who was during many years inAmerica almost the chief representative and interpreter of my ideas.When they told me of his having come and of his philosophizingconcerning the proposal I made him, and his decision also to sign thisobligation, I was in the kitchen, preparing the so to say "gravity-centerdish," as it is called by my "drones," which I did every day during mystay in New York for the purpose chiefly of having some physicalexercise, devoting each day, moreover, to the preparation of a newnational dish of some one of the peoples inhabiting all continents.That day I was preparing the favorite dish of the people inhabitingthe space between China and Russian Turkestan.At the moment when there was reported to me the arrival of Mr.Orage and of his fine philosophical deliberations, I was beating theyolks of eggs with cinnamon and pompadory.And when the outer sounding of certain of the sentences used by himbegan to be perceived in me—nobody knows why—right in the centerbetween the two hemispheres of the brain, in all that totality of thefunctioning of my organism which in general engenders in man"feeling," there gradually began a process similar to the experiencing ofa feeling called a "touchy emotion," and I suddenly, without anyconsideration, instead of a pinch of ginger, dumped into the casserolewith the left hand the whole supply in the kitchen of powdered cayennepepper, an action which is not at all proper to me during such a, for me,sacred ritual as the composition and preparation for obtaining acorresponding symphonic taste of some dish which has existed on theEarth since olden times; and, swinging my right arm in rhythm with allmy force, "dealt a blow on the back" to my poor secretary of music,who was there in the kitchen washing dishes, and then flung myself intomy room, fell on the sofa and, burying
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PREFATORY NOTE Although this text i
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Tales to His Grandson, that the Thi
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first thing, is to prepare a nucleu
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PROLOGUE I am. . .? But what has be
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"black" thoughts, I had decided to
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with the impressions with which dif
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It would, strictly speaking, even b
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Under such conditions of tension ye
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Only the next morning, when it bega
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On this original instrument I then
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And I also knew that the reason for
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there, then also in an almost delir
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Instead of lying down to sleep awhi
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I could not attain the state of "re
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The difference between Him and my s
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always in my various general states
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Even my propensity during this peri
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physical body of mine, but sucked f
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From such a "promenade," it was dis
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my exposition, I made it a custom i
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ciently long and serious mentation,
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First to die, from a long-standing
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The fact is that my mother knew not
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I began once more to remember these
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From the very beginning, from the 1
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already here, that, in their compos
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All three of the aims, self-imposed
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So, thanks to this, the third reaso
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Although all the strange will-tasks
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wits got together purposely to thin
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which follow almost all the misunde
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INTRODUCTIONNovember 6th, 1934Child
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y me at the end of 1930 and the beg
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As the mention of such a free attit
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as a supplement to the used-up prod
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The result of this was that at subs
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opinion, generally for every reader
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Expecting with indubitable certaint
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"I am not yet certain if it really
Page 82 and 83: FIRST TALKdelivered by me on Novemb
Page 84 and 85: life of people by means of the Inst
Page 86 and 87: of achievement of the required data
Page 88 and 89: advice and direction concerning sev
Page 90 and 91: Coming Good, was first noticed by t
Page 92 and 93: ing himself with his whole being of
Page 94 and 95: standings which had an equal relati
Page 96 and 97: data for their psychic functioning,
Page 98 and 99: SECOND TALKdelivered by me in the s
Page 100 and 101: other "a flea on a chain," I consid
Page 102 and 103: enthusiasm was that during our stay
Page 104 and 105: as much as my deep occupation with
Page 106 and 107: during these years, I want, simulta
Page 108 and 109: actualized and which could contribu
Page 110 and 111: the former group, a list of whose n
Page 112 and 113: fulfilling of which advice may alon
Page 114 and 115: wrote after I had very definitely s
Page 116 and 117: of all sorts of blind events and as
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Page 120 and 121: whole lexicon of words in the Engli
Page 122 and 123: to concentrate each separate part s
Page 124 and 125: and the third part should follow th
Page 126 and 127: FOURTH TALKdelivered by me on Decem
Page 128 and 129: discussions and deliberations of th
Page 130 and 131: ers of his group, but all at once,
Page 134 and 135: my head in the cushions which, by t
Page 136 and 137: those who belonged to the second gr
Page 138 and 139: inherent only in man, I wish to giv
Page 140 and 141: FIFTH TALKto the same group on Dece
Page 142 and 143: in people in general, particularly
Page 144 and 145: At the beginning it is necessary to
Page 146 and 147: In my opinion, it is only by fulfil
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Page 150 and 151: ciations automatically flowing in m
Page 152 and 153: THE OUTER AND INNER WORLD OF MAN Al
Page 154 and 155: presence of a man who has attained
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Page 158 and 159: part of the brain, the second, in a
Page 160 and 161: Work went so well that by nine o'cl
Page 162 and 163: woke up my secretary who was sleepi
Page 164 and 165: as soon as I should begin the writi
Page 166 and 167: was not a 'blood brother' of his an
Page 168 and 169: "All present sat or kneeled quietly
Page 170 and 171: In short, irrespective of my unquen
Page 172 and 173: I took The New York Times, a huge,
Page 174 and 175: THE OUTER AND INNER WORLD OF MANTHE
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Page 180 and 181: which have already been mentioned.O
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The first is the outer world—in o
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This principle, which is beyond sci
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And as soon as a man begins to thin
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GURDJIEFF, G.I. â Life is real only then, when I am - Integral Book

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GURDJIEFF, G.I. â Life is real only then, when I am - Integral Book