GURDJIEFF, G.I. – Life is real only then, when I am - Integral Book

First to die, from a long-standing illness of the liver, was my mother;some months later, from the most terrible contemporary scourge, thedisease cancer, went my wife.This country France, by the way, which is the last resting place forthose two beings uniquely nearest to me but which is indeed absolutelyforeign to my nature, remains in my feelings, thanks only to this, as if itwere my native land.And so, as I sat on this bench and almost mechanically observed thefamiliar surroundings, in me, by the association of ideas, there began tobe recollected the different experiences I had had in this same place.Suddenly remembering, I visualized as though in reality a picture whichI had frequently seen during the short periods of rest from my activementation.Namely, a picture of how from my left, in the company of twopeacocks, a cat and a dog, there slowly strolled down the path myunforgettable old mother.At this point, it is impossible not to remark on the relation between mymother and the mentioned animals, as this was indeed unusual in thelives of contemporary people.These four differently natured animals would already know in advancejust when my mother was coming out, and, gathering near the door ofher home, they would await her appearance and afterwards, wherevershe went, would very "sedately" accompany her.Always the cat would walk in front, the two peacocks at the sides andthe dog behind.Usually when my mother left her home, which was called "LeParadou," and proceeded in my direction there would approach fromthe house called "Le Prieure," my wife.31