GURDJIEFF, G.I. – Life is real only then, when I am - Integral Book

standings which had an equal relation to my ideas and also of course tome personally.The beginning of the multiplication and nourishing of thesemisunderstandings, already previously existing in great number inrelation to me and to the process for the actualization of my intentions,as well as the scattering of new ones as if from a horn of plenty, wasdue chiefly to the fact that for several months after this "misfortune" Ilost my memory entirely and then for several months more lay in asemiconscious state.The soil for a plentiful flourishing of all kinds of misunderstandingsconnected with my ideas became extraordinarily fecund because afterthe mentioned misfortune, when I began gradually to recover my usualpowers of combination and memory and, thanks to the reasons alreadydescribed by me in the last chapter of the first series of my writings,began to liquidate the main section as well as all the other sections ofthe Institute founded by me, which was established on a new basisaccording to the Statute of the Institute, people living there of everydegree of "being and comprehension," most of whom belonged tovarious independent nations composing the population of the oldRussian Empire, having no possibility of returning to their motherland,as in all these places there continued that psychosis of the masseswhich began some years previously, were obliged, on account of unexpectedcircumstances, to disperse to various countries in Europe, and toEngland and even America, depending on where they had friends orrelatives, and most of these previous pupils of my Institute, when theyfound themselves dispersed and had fallen into hard conditions, as stillcontinues to be the case for almost all the "refugees" from thispreviously rich Russia, having no data necessary for a normal earningof life in the local conditions, probably sud-