GURDJIEFF, G.I. – Life is real only then, when I am - Integral Book

In short, irrespective of my unquenchable wish to work, andirrespective of the fact that at any convenient or inconvenientopportunity I wrote and wrote, so that I might finish this book andattain the end of all the tasks I had set myself, I was, nevertheless,unable to do so.As [on April 9th, 1935] I had finally finished the prologue, I beganon the same day to write this chapter.And it was in connection with the exposition of this second chapter,on which I am now working, that the coincidence took place, withwhich I have decided to acquaint the reader, as profitable for thischapter.The whole day and night of April the 10th, with extraordinaryefforts, I worked and reworked the beginning of this chapter, which wasunsatisfactory to me, and it was not until the evening of the next daythat it seemed as if something was beginning to arrange itself, and thecertainty awoke in me that from now on it would be easier.But, after a few hours of sleep, as I began again to write further, andcame to that point where I had first used the expression "problem of theprolongation of human life," I became stuck again.This time I became stuck because it was suddenly clear to me that fora full explanation of this question which, among all the questions raisedby me in this book, I had decided to make the basic question, or as onemight say, the "clue," I must without fail, in the first place, if onlybriefly, inform the reader what position this question takes in presentdayscience and in the mentation of contemporary people.I began to ponder how to begin, so that the explanation of thisquestion should be as comprehensive as possible, and at the same timenot too long.However I "turned" the facts, known for this case, and