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marriage.
The question of Philip’s fidelity is, like the real extent of Elizabeth’s personal fortune,
the last bastion which courtiers will defend – metaphorically – to the death. Money and
sex, the two questions which most excite the public interest, are naturally the ones which
they least want to see exposed. In defence of their Queen, even the most open, frank
and truthful of courtiers is prepared to lie or feign ignorance. Since the alleged ‘party
girl’ affair in the mid-1950s, Philip has learned to carry on his flirtations and
relationships in circles rich and grand enough to provide protection from the paparazzi
and the tabloids. So discreet has he been that scurrilous accounts of his adventures have
had to be published abroad for fear of legal action. His defence has been always that the
presence of his detectives would prohibit any extra-marital activity but the exploits of
the Prince of Wales with Mrs Parker Bowles while similarly guarded has blown holes
through that particular line. The women are always younger than him, usually beautiful
and highly aristocratic.
Elizabeth notices; she is an exceptionally observant person. At a party given in
Scotland, Elizabeth was seated at a table beside the dance floor, ostensibly talking about
racing, but her eyes were elsewhere, and, as the dancers parted, she could see her
husband dancing very close to the hostess’s daughter. She sees but she does not want to
know, taking it all in her stride.
Theirs is a very royal marriage; Elizabeth’s generation was not brought up to expect
fidelity but loyalty. Affairs are one thing, passion another. Philip is not the man to fall
hopelessly in love; his affairs make no difference to a marriage as firm and indeed fond
as theirs. Elizabeth understands his desire for independence and to be his own man and
makes allowances for it. Philip goes his own way, driven, restless, always on the move.
He makes his own plans, often without consulting his wife. Mountbatten’s secretary
recalled how on several occasions Elizabeth had accepted invitations for the couple to
spend the weekend at Broadlands and would later have to telephone to say they
couldn’t come because Philip had made other arrangements. ‘After one of these calls,
Lord Mountbatten said, “God, the poor Queen really does have a tough time, because
Philip never tells her what he’s doing”.’ This, he said, was because Philip never wanted
to be dictated to and throughout their married life had striven to keep some
independence. But despite all the rumours, Philip’s often obvious flirtations and his
affairs, they still share a bed and always have done. ‘The marriage works physically,’ a
relation said. ‘I think they’ve built up the most extraordinary relationship, they’ve made
it work.’
Towards the end of his life, Mountbatten told his secretary and confidant, John
Barratt, that he believed Elizabeth’s greatest achievement was holding the family
together and coping with the family’s problems. ‘Most people can hide their family
difficulties but hers are always the focus of public attention,’ he said prophetically.
Elizabeth took her inherited role as head of the family seriously. It was, therefore,
destined to reflect on her when, under the microscope trained by the media, its members
behaved no better, and in some cases rather worse, than most families do.