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WATERING THE NEIGHBOUR'S GARDEN: THE GROWING - CICRED

WATERING THE NEIGHBOUR'S GARDEN: THE GROWING - CICRED

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SON PREFERENCE, FEMALE DEFICIT…<br />

ethnographic research among well-educated Chinese Singaporeans of<br />

the current parent generation points to a variety of gender preferences<br />

in family composition, from ‘one of each’ to a tendency for wives to<br />

prefer daughters and husbands to prefer sons. However, two characteristics<br />

of the thinking of the younger generation are notable (Graham et<br />

al., 2002). First, the wishes of the grandparent generation for a grandson<br />

are recognized but tend to be marginalized as ‘traditional’. Couples<br />

view fertility decisions as matters to be settled between themselves and<br />

claim not to be influenced by either the expectations of their elders or<br />

government policies. Secondly, economic and practical considerations<br />

mean that small family sizes are favoured over continuing the family<br />

name by providing a male heir. The narratives of some of the younger<br />

women from our ethnographic work illustrate their thinking. One<br />

mother, with two daughters born in the early 1990s, explained,<br />

“I don’t have [a gender preference] but that time my husband<br />

said that he hoped to have a son lah. Be it the first<br />

one or the second one, he hoped to have one... But, um,<br />

you know that they prefer but if there isn’t any, they are<br />

not old-fashioned thinking in that sense that they must<br />

keep on trying, in that sense lah. But myself I do not have<br />

a preference.”<br />

Another mother, whose first child is a daughter and whose second<br />

child was born in 2000, declared her disappointment that it was a boy!<br />

“I had her [daughter] and when I was going to have the<br />

second one, I was hoping and hoping it will be a girl…<br />

Maybe I thought because it is more economical. Her<br />

clothes will go on to the second one. I don’t have to spend<br />

money all over again. So that was the idea but after some<br />

time when I realized that it’s actually a boy. I got used to<br />

the idea okay, it’s a girl and a boy. I don’t know why. Again<br />

I guess it’s because of my background. Two boys in a family,<br />

enough. I want a girl. I prefer girls. Girls are closer to<br />

their mums I guess.”<br />

This ethnographic evidence hints at a considerably greater flexibility<br />

in the kinship system amongst Chinese Singaporeans compared to<br />

patterns found in China and South Korea (Das Gupta, 2003), although<br />

the extent to which these ‘non-traditional’ attitudes are common across<br />

the Singaporean population is unknown. However, it may be that<br />

significant increases in female participation in higher education and<br />

salaried employment in the last decade have contributed to a diminution<br />

in son preference in some groups, as reflected in our group of<br />

well-educated women. The limited evidence supports this conclusion<br />

101

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