WATERING THE NEIGHBOUR'S GARDEN: THE GROWING - CICRED

DISCRIMINATION FROM CONCEPTION TO CHILDHOOD…
3.2.3. Frequency of abortion according to childhood experience, autonomy, and
married life and some other characteristics
We observed a relation between the experience of abortion and
women’s childhood experience as their perceived status in the natal
family has significant impact on abortion. A majority of women who
perceived their status in the natal family as better had undergone an
abortion, which was less common among those who perceived their
status as average or low. A woman reported thus: 5
“Khud bahut dukh saha hai bachpan main, isliye mujhe ladki nehi
chahiye tha. Lekin mujhe teen beti ke baad ek beta hua hai. Agar
pehele ladka hota to, ek bhi ladki nehi chahiye thi”. [I had a harsh
life during my childhood. That’s why I did not like to have
a daughter. But only after having three daughters I had a
son. If I had a son before my daughters, then I certainly
would not have any daughters]–(Age 31 years, mother of
one son and three daughters).
A positive relationship has been noticed between women’s autonomy
and their experience of abortion. About 30 percent of women
with a higher autonomy index had experienced abortion compared to
23 percent with medium autonomy and 18 percent with lower autonomy.
Our findings should be seen here with some caution because of
the cross sectional nature of the data. It may not be due to women’s
autonomy per se, but the other way round: women’s autonomy level
tends to improve as they abort female foetuses and have subsequently
a male birth. This is also evident from our qualitative survey in the
community. A woman expressed how she felt before her son was born:
“Bhitar ka gham aadmi ko kabhi khusi nehi deti hai. Jab ladkian
ho rahi thi, to demagi taur pe bahut kamzor ho gayi thi, sochi thi ki
yeh bhi koi zindegi hai? Ek ladka hone ke baad thoda khushi hui.
Jis maa ka ek bhi ladka nehi hai, usko to pati pitega hi. Jaith bhi
pitt te the. Unke bachche bhi. Shaadi shuda jiban main ek hi khusi
hai, baalak ka janam hona. Dukh to sare hai”. [If you are sad
from the core of your heart then you will never feel happy
in any situation. When I was giving birth only to daughters,
I mentally became very weak. My husband used to beat me
even my brother-in-law and his children. If a mother does
not have a son, then her husband will beat her. After the
birth of my son, I felt somewhat happy. In my married life
the only happiness I got was at the birth of my son. Oth-
5 Excerpts given in this chapter are in the local Hindi variant.
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