The-Conquest-of-Happiness-by-Bertrand-Russell

possibly in its turn externalising part of itself in the
same fashion, and so securing the immortality of
the germ-plasm. On the other hand there is an
intimate blend of power and tenderness. The new
creature is helpless, and there is an impulse to
supply its needs, an impulse which gratifies not
only the parent’s love towards the child, but also
the parent’s desire for power. So long as the infant
is felt to be helpless, the affection which is
bestowed upon it does not feel unselfish, since it is
in the nature of protection to a vulnerable portion
of oneself. But from a very early age there comes
to be a conflict between love of parental power
and desire for the child’s good, for, while power
over the child is to a certain extent decreed by the
nature of things, it is nevertheless desirable that the
child should as soon as possible learn to be
independent in as many ways as possible, which is
unpleasant to the power impulse in a parent. Some
parents never become conscious of this conflict,
and remain tyrants until the children are in a
position to rebel. Others, however, become
conscious of it, and thus find themselves a prey to