narratives of three generations of urban middle-class - eTheses ...

This process of mundane-ization or profane-ization of the sacred image of the goddess
by her everyday domestic associations with ideal femininity is reaffirmed by a
construction of Lakshmi’s binary/opposite, Alakshmi, (anti-Lakshmi), her dark and
malevolent ‘other’. This other side came to embody a gendered and elitist conception of
inauspiciousness and the opposite of all that the Hindu law givers upheld as Dharma
(proper moral conduct) of the householder. The very presence of words like Lakshmi
and Alakshmi in the literature on women’s education reveals much about the ideals of
modern Bengali patriarchy (Chakrabarty, 2000: 226-227). Lack of education would
make women quarrelsome and too much of it, defiant of authority. Western education in
“improper dozes” would also turn a woman into a “Memsahib” who is the Western ‘other’
of the nationalist/patriarchal idealization of bhadramahila or the respectable middleclass
woman, marked by her education but also by her feminine lajja (grace and modesty)
(Chakrabarty, 2000: 224).
Third generation Boudhayan similarly claims,
“Today men and women are equal and for instance, it will be ‘backdated’ and
‘politically incorrect’ of me not to offer a ‘cigarette’ to a female friend when I light
one myself (expresses sarcasm). We middle-class Bengalis are indeed more
‘progressive’ than people of other states in India in terms of equality of education
and opportunities for men and women. However, at the risk of sounding
‘conservative’, let me confess, amra Bharatiya purushera (we Indian men) and
particularly moddhobittyo Bangalira (middle-class Bengalis) are still
uncomfortable with seeing a woman smoke and drink because we are not very
familiar with seeing most of our mothers do these. Like my friend Siddharta says,
a woman’s beauty and ‘grace’ is destroyed with a ‘cigarette’ in her hand and
slang coming out of her mouth!”
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