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Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can ... - WordPress.com

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pro-social. But as we’ve seen, neitherformulation is correct; <strong>in</strong>troverts andextroverts are differently social. Whatpsychologists call “the need for <strong>in</strong>timacy”is present <strong>in</strong> <strong>in</strong>troverts and extrovertsalike. In fact, people who value<strong>in</strong>timacy highly don’t tend to be, as thenoted psychologist David Buss puts it,“the loud, outgo<strong>in</strong>g, life-<strong>of</strong>-the-party extrovert.”<strong>The</strong>y are more likely to besomeone with a select group <strong>of</strong> closefriends, who prefers “s<strong>in</strong>cere and mean<strong>in</strong>gfulconversations over wild parties.”<strong>The</strong>y are more likely to be someonelike Emily.Conversely, extroverts do not necessarilyseek closeness from their socializ<strong>in</strong>g.“Extroverts seem to need people asa forum to fill needs for social impact,just as a general needs soldiers to fillhis or her need to lead,” the psychologistWilliam Graziano told me. “When641/929

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