Self-Esteem Research, Theory, and Practice Toward a Positive ...

Major Self-Esteem Research Findings 99gravitate toward providing positive feedback “unconditionally,” whichoccurs in terms of affirming one’s worth as a unique human being. Andthose who advocate a cognitive approach to the self know the value ofpositive and negative feedback in such a dynamic system.There are, however, two caveats to be aware of when applying sucha technique. First, humanistic psychology states that such feedbackmust be “authentic,” which is to say based in reality and not phonypraise. Second, some cognitive research indicates that there might bevalue in providing positive feedback in a way that is slow but steadyrather than fast or sudden. Their understanding for this practice is thatthe self-system is designed to be and to remain stable, even when itsoverall character is negative or painful. Trying to change things tooquickly is disruptive to the system and it is likely to be resisted throughself-handicapping or some other way of discounting the information(Bednar, Wells & Peterson, 1989; Bednar & Peterson, 1995; Epstein,1985). Consequently, small positive doses of positive feedback are likelyto be more effective than larger ones because they are non-threateningenough to slip into the system, thereby gradually altering it over time.Generating Positive Self-Feedbackthrough Cognitive RestructuringIn addition to others providing us with feedback that affects our identityand esteem, we provide it to ourselves. This process can be understoodpsychodynamically in terms of narcissistic supplies and ego ideals orhumanistically in terms of meaning and choices. However, the cognitiveapproach offers the most empirically supported method of intervening atthis level. This technique involves three basic steps: learning how to identifyproblematic habits, labeling them as such according to some nomenclatureof common errors, and then substituting a more rational orrealistic response for each mistake. Several authors provide lists of commonlyused terms describing the problematic thinking patterns that causeinaccurate perceptions and unnecessary pain (Burns, 1980, 1993a;Freeman, Pretzer, Fleming & Simon, 1990; Leahy, 2003). These techniquesmay work on increasing self-esteem in several ways. First, theyinterrupt the normally smooth-flowing links between thinking, feeling,and acting in negative ways that create and maintain low self-esteem,thereby creating the possibility for something new to happen. Second,being able to demonstrate some control over behavior allows the individualto feel competent, which is conducive to self-esteem. Third, withpractice, new habits of perceiving, thinking, experiencing, and acting alsoset up a more virtuous cycle.