L E T T E R S

553whatever graces were needed to correct and perfect himself completely, togetherwith the grace of a very successful future. I also asked that God grant all goodthings to my Lady, and to all of those who are dear to her heart. When I return, Iwill consider it one of my primary obligations - it is one of my most sacredresolutions – to show my gratitude to Madame for her gracious and Christianfriendship for me, and to him for the special trust that he places in me, to hold afew good meetings with him to sound him out... to repair what might need repair,and to encourage him once again to good. I will also count it as my obligation topay careful and constant attention to his studies and behavior, and to reportanything wrong to my Lady. This is a bouquet which I gathered for my Ladyduring my retreat, bound together by all the sacramental holiness of theresolutions I made while I was here. I send it as an offering to my Lady. I have yetanother for my Lady: more personal, made up of beautiful resolutions; but Ishould not frighten you before time. While here, I am slowly preparing a pressingspiritual attack on someone, for there she may be pampered: ―Aj! Aj! ThatFrances is so good! How splendidly she speaks of the saints. How pius she is. Sheis an angel, a saint!‖ That is how they all speak of her there. And perhaps theyconvince her...? Whereas, here I am. I know the Lady. With half gruff and halfdelicate openness, and without pity, I say to her: What does this mean? And whyis that spot there? Does that green, that yellow, that grey almost become black?Fi! Everything ought to be white!But now I hurry along with my first-aid kit: bleaching powders, medicines,prescriptions, surgical cutting! I meet with pain, screaming, weeping. I do notwish to frighten you before time. I want you to be deeply humble before God, andnot trust yourself so much; and guard against the slightest stain. Use the HolySacraments to be washed clean of every stain as soon as possible, and to becomeagain as white as a true angel.I permit myself to engage in these spiritual vagaries, a kind of writtencontinuation of our conversations, confident that, after Madame has read all ofthis scratching, she will immediately burn it, lest it fall into some third person’shands, for the might, absolutely without reason, be scandalized by all this.