THE DHAMMAPADA: THE WAY OF THE BUDDHA, VOL. 9-12 The ...

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154 THE DHAMMAPADA: THE WAY OF THE BUDDHA, VOL. 9-12 So there was a case in the High Court against him, and in that case his servant confessed that he was the man who used to hide on the roof. He went and showed the hole and the place where he used to hide, and everything was discovered. Still, people go on reading those letters believing that Koot Humi wrote them. When people want to believe, when they are feeling empty, some belief is needed. They cling to anything, they don’t listen... they don’t listen to their own heart. They just need belief; so anybody is ready to supply it. Wherever there is demand there is supply. People need fictions, so there are other people clever, cunning people who go on supplying fictions. In a Catholic school, little Hans was asked to give an example of a dependent clause. ”Our cat has a litter of ten kittens,” he replied, ”all of which are good Catholics.” ”That’s excellent,” said the teacher. ”You have a good grasp on grammar as well as on our religion.” The following week the bishop visited the school and the teacher called on Hans. ”Our cat has a litter of ten kittens,” said Hans, ”all of which are good sannyasins.” ”That is not what you said a week ago!” snapped the teacher. ”Yes,” replied Hans, ”but my kittens’ eyes are open now.” Be a little alert, be a little watchful. There are deceiving people all around; you can be easily deceived. Morrissey, the ventriloquist, was on his way down to a bar for a drink when a big shaggy dog fell in at his side. They went in, the ventriloquist ordered a scotch, and for a laugh he looked at the dog and said, ”Well, are you having the usual?” ”No, thanks, I have had enough this morning,” said the dog. The barman was flabbergasted. He offered fifty dollars for the animal. ”No, sir!” said Morrissey. ”I have had him since he was a pup.” ”I’ll make it a hundred dollars!” said the bartender. Morrissey shook his head. When the offer went to five hundred dollars the ventriloquist grabbed the money and headed for the door. ”all right,” he added, ”take good care of him.” And with a last look at the dog, ”Farewell, old pal!” he exclaimed. ”Old pal, my foot!” said the dog. ”After what you have just done I will never speak to another human being as long as I live!” Be aware of the cunning people, they are all around. Don’t be exploited. Long enough humanity has been exploited by the cunning and the clever; it is time to put a full stop to it. Be a little more mature. If you want to explore inner space, meditate. Listen to what Buddha says: Quieten the mind, reflect, watch, and all darkness will disappear on its own accord, and you will be full of light. The fourth question: Question 4 BELOVED MASTER, YOUR JOKES ARE FAR OUT! EASE UP A LITTLE ON THE PRIESTS. BELOVED MASTER, I REJOICE WITH EXISTENCE BECAUSE OF YOUR ENLIGHTENMENT! I FEEL GOOD TO BE HERE, TO BE HOME AFTER YEARS OF SEARCHING. Deva Chintana, I am sorry if it hurts you. I know.... Deva Chintana has been a nun. She has been courageous. She dropped out of the monastery and became a sannyasin. And my jokes about the priests must be looking a little hard to her, naturally. I should have thought of her. I will be more careful in the future, Chintana. A joke for you: The pope died... and naturally assumed that he would go to heaven. So, dressed in all his papal finery, he went striding up towards the Pearly Gates, brushed past Saint Peter, and made straight for the entrance. ”Hey, you! Where are you going?” shouted Saint Peter, and two guardian angels stepped forward to bar the way. ”Look-a here,” said the pope. ”I am-a da popa and I....” ”Who?” ”Da Popa!!! I am-a da popa of da Catholic-a Church-a and I wanna go to heaven.” ”The pope?” said Saint Peter. ”Never heard of you. We don’t have anyone of that name in our books, do we, Gabriel? No, sorry sir, you cannot come in.” ”Hey, come on! I am-a da popa! You gotta let me in. Ask-a God da Father he knows me!” Saint Peter calls God the Father: ”Hey, God, this is Saint Peter gate duty. Sorry to disturb you but there is a guy here who calls himself the popa and wants to come inside says you know him.” ”Who?” asks God the Father. ”The popa.” ”Who?”
THE DHAMMAPADA: THE WAY OF THE BUDDHA, VOL. 9-12 155 ”I think that’s what he said.” ”No, never heard of him.” ”Sorry, Pope God the Father says he doesn’t know you.” ”What? But leesten, I am-a da popa. He must know me! Look-a here, you ask God da Son. For sure he knows me I am-a his representative on da earth-a he must-a know me!” Saint Peter calls God the Son, but the answer is the same: ”The pope? No, I’ve never heard of him!” The pope is in despair: ”Look-a, you gotta help me. Ring-a the Holy Ghost for sure he knows me! I am da popa da popa of the Catholic-a Church-a, the spiritual representative of Jesus Christ-a on da earth-a!! He has just gotta know me!” Saint Peter calls the Holy Ghost. ”Hmmm, the pope, you say!” answers the Holy Ghost. ”Hmm, yes, I’ve heard that name before somewhere.... Wait a minute! He’s that bastard who goes on spreading rumors about me and Virgin Mary. Tell him to go to hell!” Chintana, I will try my best. But the priests are the priests; they are the most ugly people on the earth, the most cunning and the most mean, although their appearance is totally different. And I am not saying that there are not some good people. Some good people are also caught in the net, but those good people are childish. Those good people are gullible, those good people are easily exploitable. Humanity has to get rid of priesthood, only then can there be religion. They have been very destructive. It is because of them that the world is not religious yet. They have divided humanity instead of making humanity one whole. Much more blood has been shed in the name of religion than in the name of anything else. In fact, I am not really hard on them, I am very soft with them. They need to be hit harder. And when I am hitting them, I am not really hitting them, but simply hitting your conditioning. What do I have to do with the pope or the shankaracharya or the imam or Ayatollah Khomeiniac? I have nothing to do with these people. But when I hit them I am simply hitting the chains inside you that keep you in a bondage. My jokes about the priests are just to help you to come out of the prison, laughing. I don’t want it to become a serious affair for you to come out of the prison, because if it becomes a serious affair you will be affected by your seriousness and you will carry that load with you. And there is every danger that you will start projecting your seriousness on me. I can free you from the priest very easily, but the danger is that you may start projecting all that you have been projecting on the priest, on me. That is not freedom at all; only your chains are changed. Someone else has asked me: Question 5 BELOVED MASTER, I AM A COWARD AND I CANNOT TAKE SANNYAS. WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO ME? Jesus was on the cross, a thief on either side of him. Suddenly the guards disappeared and they were alone. Seeing that there was no one around, Jesus addressed the two thieves. ”Repent, my brethren!” he said. ”Repent, and the Kingdom of God will be opened unto you. I will take you with me to the House of my Father. repent!” One of the thieves bowed down to Jesus, saying, ”I repent, my Lord! Take me with you into the Kingdom of God!” The other thief turned his head away in disdain. ”Stop all this crap!” he exclaimed. Jesus insisted, ”Repent! Come to my feet!” ”Fuck you!” replied the thief. Jesus looked at him compassionately, and said, ”Tough luck, old bean! You won’t be in the souvenir picture, that’s all!” So don’t be worried if you are not a sannyasin. If you cannot gather courage to be a sannyasin, you won’t be in the souvenir picture, that’s all. Don’t take it seriously. My whole effort here is to make sannyas as nonserious as possible. I don’t want to become a pope or a shankaracharya. I don’t want to become a replacement for you, a substitute for you. I don’t want to become a father figure to you. I want simply to be a friend. Hence my discourses are not ordinarily religious sermons. I am just chitchatting. They are not gospels, but gossips! Enough for today. The Dhammapada: The Way of the Buddha, Vole 10 Chapter 9 Delight in meditation Audio:Yes Video:No Length:0 mins
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