Articles Book III - Pg 300-560 (Birthparents) - triadoption

sotisiblo ~iinri. Regarding tlio adoption case.
slio commontotl tliot tliis ntlol~tion liad
tnkon ploco in tiio Marltirncs wlioro slio
Iliouglit, nt tliot tinio, social servicos were
not so otfvaricod. She iriipliod tlint a
niotlorn odoptio~i, dorio properly, woulrl not
protluco sucli an c~rrlial~py atloptoe.
Ariotlinr parson whoso ar1vlcc I sought was
o nun, tlio Motlior Superior in a liorno for
uriwod motliors. Allliougli I was not
Cntiiolic. I tl~ouglit it worthwliilo to sock
nriotiier ol~lnion. Looking back, I think I was
still hoping to find sorncono wlio would toll
mo it wos ell right lor mo to koop riiy baby. I
folt as tiiougli I liod already trunsgressccl
ogolnst society by conceiving o child out-
01-wodlock ond ovcryono I consc~ltcd
sooniod to bo indicating to ~iic that I would
bo committing an odditional sin by not
giving up tlio baby lor adoption. I wanted to
keep my baby, but I also wanted to fool tliat
I hod tlio approval ol otliur pcol~lc In doing
so, because I did not fool I hod tho couragc
to go against socloty's wislics. Bosidcs. I
was gonulnely concerned about what really
was tlio most fair thing to do.
Tlio Motlior Superior asked me if i prayed
often and wlion i said I did not, told me I
sliould alwnys pray, not only when I was in
dillicultios. Slio olso suggostocl that I talk to
o niinistor, or minister's wile, 01 my own
loitli. She said an unwed niotl~cr with any
intolligonca would think carefully about
wliotlior or not to koop her baby, but tlien
wont on lo state, quite ompliaticolly, tlint
whorl an unmarried motlicr did decide to
keep lior child: "It doesn't work out lor tlio
rnotlior ond it doesn't work out for tlio
child."
The only porson wlio gave me any en
courngorilont to scok a solution other tlion
adoption was a counsoilor at tho YMCA-
YWCA wliom I went to sco for vocotional
counsoiiing. [He told 1iio I liod dono well on
tiio 1.0. tests and sliould considcr going to
univorsity if I could.) Wlicri wo discussor1
llio situation I was in, ho said lie tliouglit
thoro wore just as nialiy arguments in
favour of keeping tlio baby as tlioro were
for hovlng it placed lor adoption, arid
strggcstod 1 riiiglit be ol11e to fir~rl i~ 1ir11no
whero tlicro wore othor young chiltlron nnrl
wlioro tlio ~notlior would be williril] to look
alter riiy baby durlng tlic day wlillo I
workod arid then I could take over tlie cnro
of tilo I~nby, arid liolp in tlie housc, wlion I
carno Iionio from work.
I thought this was an Intorosting idea, but
did not know liow to go c111out linrling such
a porson. Tlio ordinary oriil~loyrii~!~it ngon.
cios didn't soorri to covor tliat kind 01 tliin~j.
NI~ now otnploycr iiod told me, on tlio ni!llil
of my nrrlvol, tiiat I could not keep lily l~nl~y
in lior homo. Sonioorio clse told 1110 obot~l n
wo~non wlio liod ernployod an uti~iiarriorl
niotiicr as a don~ostic servant arid liod
ollowod lior to kocp tlio l~nby witli licr. 1011.
tainod tliis woman's addrcss and wont to
sco her, hoping tlial If she no longer had tlio
othor girl witli lior she nii(]lit corisidor omploying
mo. My hopes wore soon dosliotl.
This won~i~ri told mo tliat tho girl llod
worked woll boloro tho boby was born, llut
oftorwards liad spent most of lior limo
doing lltings for tho bal~y and, since tliis
was not satisfactory from lier omployor's
point of viow, slio was lot go. (And tlio
woman wosn't keen to try tliis cxpcriment
again.)
By this tinlo I had passod tlio Iialfwny point
111 my pregnancy ond os yet liad found no
solution for tiio future.
Tlio CAS had a consultant psycliiatrist ancl
it was suggcstcd tliat I soo lier. i think tliis
miglit liavo boon bocousc I liad told tliorn
about tho porlod in my life when I liad boon
vory depressed. During olio appointment
witli this Dr. Mullor I montioncd tho
suggestion that tlio Y counsellor liad ninrlo.
Dr. Mulicr comnicntcd tliat it wos vory bad,
psycliologicnlly, for yourig pooplo to 110 in
an environniont whore they wero constontly
boiny warned not to toucli tliings and I
gntlicrotl flint slio was in~plyicig- ti~al this
miglit bo tlio case il I wore living with lily
boby in soriioorio else's liot~so. I discussed
tire niattcr later witii Miss Wallocc and slio
agreed will1 Dr. Mullor.
Iliefio consultations with Dr. Mulinr rinitlinr
FAMILY INVOLVEMENT