Articles Book III - Pg 300-560 (Birthparents) - triadoption

wonicn's Wcws Society Stylc Family
v of Losing a Child
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By CEORGl! II. GRIFFIN rrrn~hrlhcr rho war 11111 allre, hrvc
Tclrf,rarn hllltord Burr10 chanacd her mllld.
"In my cnunsclln~lhrre wnsnodlr.
hlll.~XlRb - Gayle Ilrnrscn prvc curslon.of how lo rope with lhcrc
up hcr daughlcr for adopllon 10 yerra fccllnga," hlrr. IIrnlscn rald. "It war
qo.
mII plolrcd over. The law prorldts
Al the ilmo rhe thoughl It wag the that we can ncvrr know what hap .
T1arouglh rfght thlngto do. Shr was an unnlar. wncd lo our chlld. l~torlurc not
rlrd collc((c rludcnl. me caunlellng knowlnn. 11'1 a punlshntmt un~ulbd
she rrcclvrd. the alllludc of the adnp lolhrcrl~nc."
Adoption tl~n~ncy,~d~~oltherhll~r Mrs. llr.n~~on'a conccrn~ a t hc,
lalhrr lo rcmaln monymnum, her da~~ul~lcr led her In loln the Con.
jiulll Icd her to bcllcvc rdopllon was ccrncd Utlltcd Dlrlhprrcnts. Inc., a
lhe bell legacy she could leave her non~prnfll corporallan fnundrd lo hclp
, a dauphlcr. I parcnlr who have rurrcndcrrd lhclr
Dul years of no1 knowln~ whclher chlldrcntormdopllon.
hre daughlrr was bclnu well.lrralcd Thc corporallan was prulnl~ed In
or no~, whether rha had a
.. cwd home. Turn IOAE'IE~ GIVING ~a.,rn
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',Givhg. a '
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... Afier
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Child Up. . .
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~onflnurdfm~ Pagef~ ."It cmn also glve you problrmr In record Is scalcd. A new. blrlh cerlln ;'
trurllnf, men." she mnllnuc$. "I gave tale, llstlng lhcnamn ofthe adupllng p
Oclober, 1918, and now has chaplcrr up my child 10 yerrr ego. hly dauph. parcnls 81 the parents, Is fllcd. Asm
acmsr the counln.me mddres, ol llr s trr Xrlrlrn L.8 now. The flnl llme clca mlto ollm,won'l glvc the blrlh.' 1
na(lonal hcadpuarlcra Is P.O. Box she war *pay from me war lo slay ~parcnlrcoplcsoflhqadopllonpapen.
"
st,, ~llfotd. &IN. Ilansarn 11 the ovcrnlghl wllh my prrrnls. I was re. "We also want lo make ouraclver
corporallon'aiecrcIIry. '
luclanl lo lel her ally ovemlghl. 1 avallmblc to. pregnant, unmrrtird
rrlcd all the way home lnlhe car. womrn;'shcrnld:"Wewanllomrke 11
cell: supporl
Part 01 me war 1aylnR.'I'11 never an known lo lhrm lhal wi.,havc shard
hcragrln."! . , ,
"Our flrsl((orl la toprnvldcs~~pporl
for 'blrlhparcnlr; BIgBoslnesr . lhcy arcgolng through. I
" hln. Ilanssrn 1n1 .
rrld. "We have parllculrr problems hln. tlansscn srld unwed molhcra The llnal lhlng we arc dolng Is in
lhal we all la*. Soclal workera lcll are subJectrd to lnlense pressure lo our publlc.cducallon role." Mrs. PI \I
you that Or Idea Is you are no1 aup glve up lhelr chlldren tor adnpllun, llanarcn contlnucd.~'Nlncly~Nur per.
pored lo lhlnk mboul the adopllon or even If lhcy 8.1 they wan1 lo kccp vccnlof blrlhprrmb wan1 to be tound.
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. . . lhclr cipcrlrnce and we know 7h.L I 1
. fcrl the loss of your chlld, Dul we lhelrbablcs. ;. . . Wo are no1 a rcarch aucncy, bul ws ,
know you can ?ever forget about a
.'One faclar lrihat adopllonlr a blb ' can rvfcr aommne who is looking for '
chlld. . . monrymaklng burlncrr." rbc sald, 1111 ur her bklhps~nl
"Secondly, we play m rdvocicy "When an rpcnq placcs a chlld. It acarrhagmcy. . I :
or chlld
rolc to asrlst blrlhparentr In lhclr gclr a fr.r:Some agcnclcr grl blg
.i,,,C,re here We ,but
dcallngl vlB adopllon m#rnclrs." tccl. When an agency helps l molhcr (he wclf,re of our rhlldrcn. \YC rant
hln. Ilanssm aald the alllludo ot kccp a child. IIgclrno fec.
lo know our chlldren evrnlually. \Vc
~oclcly and faus of adopllon laws cr.. "We know of a woman In Washlng to bc lo cIpliln we did
cludc blrlhparcnlr lmm the llrer of toll. D. C. who cat golnn lo arrmge
lr lorlhcm."
. lhelr chlldr~ once lhe ~dopllon Pa. for mn open adopllon.'.Thal Is, she
pcrs ~rerl~td.Orlglnal blrlh ccriln. would have mn opporlunlly lo mccl
calcr am realcd. Adopllon agcncler lhefamlly betorr the actual rdopllon.
gcncrrll~ nfuse lo any where the. She had lhlr arranged lhmugh m
chlld har b m placcd. 0tlcn:adopllon ,.church i8crley.
agmcln do not kccpbmck bfehlldrcn .: !-Bui,anolher rgrncy told hcr lhlr
;.:?;: ha~;?:,:,$~,?, *he ; was absolutcl~ illcgrl. 7hcy prea.
I: surd .her .to place &he :*Ud :?llh
worken are a pmduct of them. . . _.. . ., .,. . .. ,
.'~ac~al
thrlr ,balnlnf, and cducmllon:' Uln. ~lhc lnformatlon i.e were (~lvcn la
Ilmnssen rald. !?cy IIU~Y bmlu on lhrl Le agency lhrt.arrangcd lhc
how to counacl unwrd molhen. Bul' open adopllon wma golng lobe glven a
IQc bwlu urn no1 wrlllm by anwed . $200 10 Stw in. Th?,closcd.mgcncy
mothen.methcoq 11 wrong." wa~polngtof,t112,1w..~ -':;' : '
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. 'Ihc two ancnclo wcrc fym lhc
' P1ycbo~o~c~~hohbmr , , ramechurch.nlalrd organlzallon bul
rcrc In d!tfrrcnl dloccrca:Many ol us
Mrs. lhns'cn raid Ihs lack of rclc- .frcI that romellma adobllon la Jusl
van1 munlcllng. the mfuaml of adop ,cg.lkd:eh(ld ,elllnp..ll~,~b~g burl.
. lion wmclcs lo Pmvldc 1nform.llon .nrss. Ilo, man, ,dQpllona
m,lly
. on the weltarr of the mdoplrd chlld unn-?,nl,: :$. , ,
and anrleUrr cr~~rcd by fcellnps of ,:::,. ,
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gull1 artcn lrrd (o prychologlc~lpmb . . A Rlgbl la Rand:. '.
. 'ern of lhe Cm6crncd Unllcd Dlrih.
lrms for lhc blrthpmrrnl.
parenti' philosophy 1% that every par.
hbr. 'lannrrn Ir marrlcd and now
en1 ihou~d hmre a lo knqy ~l.1
has lwomoredaughlrn.
hla or hcr chlld L, well. ParrnU who
"You've losl r chlld." she amld. In lo nnd out bow lhclr chlldrrn arc
"You devdcp a fear of loslng your orfen are refused IIIC lnlo+aUon,
olhcr chlldrm. We hmve problrmr Llrr. llanrsrnrmld. ' . . i
aboul how we ice1 almul oursrlvrl. "We.rupparl lrglrlrllon for'opcn
You Ice your other chlldrcndlllennb rccordr:' hln, l3mrstn rdd. "We
Iy, Im. You nrvrr,knm when you uanl lo @ able In gel coplra of blrlh .
glvcup r rhlld for adopllon how II wlll crrtlllralcr. 11 dlgnlner the conlrlbu.
altul your rclrllonrl~lps wllh your llon re make lo lhcrc chlldrrn. Once ,
.: olhcrchlldrcnoryourhuaband. .. 'a chlld ir adoplrd, hL orlplnal birth
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I~S~CN~~.CL./ CAL. n~P~l7.5
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