(Bk Business) Carol Kinsey Goman Ph.D.-The Nonverbal Advantage_ Secrets and Science of Body Language at Work -Berrett-Koehler Publishers (2008)

Chapter 10: Selling Your Message without Saying a Word
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The Silent Language of Leadership
Managers looking to help their organizations, their teams, or
their departments thrive in the twenty-first century need to
forget about issuing orders or coercing with threats. Success
in today’s world takes employee engagement and creative
collaboration—both of which must be freely given. You can’t
force people to care or create or share their best ideas with
others, but you can influence their behavior and motivate
them to achieve great things.
To be a successful leader at any level of the organization,
you need to tune in to the body language of those you
lead so that you can understand the meaning behind what’s
being said. That’s why all the nonverbal cues you’ve learned
in this book will be extremely valuable. But you also need
to be aware that nonverbally you are constantly expressing
your feelings, your likes and dislikes, and your expectations.
(All leaders express enthusiasm, warmth, and confidence—as
well as arrogance, indifference, and displeasure through their
facial expressions, gestures, touch, and use of space.)
When your nonverbal messages conflict with your verbal
messages, the people you are talking to become confused.
Mixed signals have a negative effect on performance and
make it almost impossible to build relationships of trust. This
is true whether you are the chief executive officer, a department
head, a team leader, or a first-line supervisor.
Consider, for example, the oil company CEO who showed
up at a refinery in an expensive suit and tie to discuss the
firm’s state of affairs with rank-and-file operators, electricians,
and members of the warehouse staff, who were dressed
in their blue, fire-retardant overalls. That was just the beginning.
After being introduced and walking to the front of the
room, he removed his wristwatch (probably a Rolex) and