Three Men in a Boat / Three Men on the Bummel

More documents

Recommendations

Info

— 238 — lers. It commenced “On a Steam-boat,” and term<strong>in</strong>ated “At the Doctor’s”; its longest chapter be<strong>in</strong>g devoted to conversation <strong>in</strong> a railway carriage, among, apparently, a compartment load of quarrelsome and ill-mannered lunatics: “Can you not get further away from me, sir?” — “It is impossible, madam; my neighbour, here, is very stout” — “Shall we not endeavour to arrange our legs?” — “Please have the goodness to keep your elbows down” — “Pray do not <strong>in</strong>convenience yourself, madam, if my shoulder is of any accommodation to you,” whether <strong>in</strong>tended to be said sarcastically or not, there was noth<strong>in</strong>g to <strong>in</strong>dicate — “I really must request you to move a little, madam, I can hardly breathe,” the author’s idea be<strong>in</strong>g, presumably, that by this time the whole party was mixed up together on the floor. The chapter concluded with the phrase, “Here we are at our dest<strong>in</strong>ation, God be thanked! (Gott sei dank!)” a pious exclamation, which under the circumstances must have taken the form of a chorus. At the end of the book was an appendix, giv<strong>in</strong>g the German traveller h<strong>in</strong>ts concern<strong>in</strong>g the preservation of his health and comfort dur<strong>in</strong>g his sojourn <strong>in</strong> English towns, chief among such h<strong>in</strong>ts be<strong>in</strong>g advice to him to always travel with a supply of dis<strong>in</strong>fectant powder, to always lock his bedroom door at night, and to always carefully count his small change. “It is not a brilliant publication,” I remarked, hand<strong>in</strong>g the book back to George; “it is not a book that personally I would recommend to any German about to visit England; I th<strong>in</strong>k it would get him disliked. But I have read books published <strong>in</strong> London for the use of English travellers abroad every whit as foolish. Some educated idiot, misunderstand<strong>in</strong>g seven languages, would appear to go about writ<strong>in</strong>g these books for the mis<strong>in</strong>formation and false guidance of modern Europe.” “You cannot deny,” said George, “that these books are <strong>in</strong> large request. They are bought by the thousand, I know. In every town <strong>in</strong> Europe there must be people go<strong>in</strong>g about talk<strong>in</strong>g this sort of th<strong>in</strong>g.” “Maybe,” I replied; “but fortunately nobody understands
— 239 — them. I have noticed, myself, men stand<strong>in</strong>g on railway platforms and at street corners read<strong>in</strong>g aloud from such books. Nobody knows what language they are speak<strong>in</strong>g; nobody has the slightest knowledge of what they are say<strong>in</strong>g. This is, perhaps, as well; were they understood they would probably be assaulted.” George said: “Maybe you are right; my idea is to see what would happen if they were understood. My proposal is to get to London early on Wednesday morn<strong>in</strong>g, and spend an hour or two go<strong>in</strong>g about and shopp<strong>in</strong>g with the aid of this book. There are one or two little th<strong>in</strong>gs I want — a hat and a pair of bedroom slippers, among other articles. Our boat does not leave Tilbury till twelve, and that just gives us time. I want to try this sort of talk where I can properly judge of its effect. I want to see how the foreigner feels when he is talked to <strong>in</strong> this way.” It struck me as a sport<strong>in</strong>g idea. In my enthusiasm I offered to accompany him, and wait outside the shop. I said I thought that Harris would like to be <strong>in</strong> it, too — or rather outside. George said that was not quite his scheme. His proposal was that Harris and I should accompany him <strong>in</strong>to the shop. With Harris, who looks formidable, to support him, and myself at the door to call the police if necessary, he said he was will<strong>in</strong>g to adventure the th<strong>in</strong>g. We walked round to Harris’s, and put the proposal before him. He exam<strong>in</strong>ed the book, especially the chapters deal<strong>in</strong>g with the purchase of shoes and hats. He said: “If George talks to any bootmaker or any hatter the th<strong>in</strong>gs that are put down here, it is not support he will want; it is carry<strong>in</strong>g to the hospital that he will need.” That made George angry. “You talk,” said George, “as though I were a foolhardy boy without any sense. I shall select from the more polite and less irritat<strong>in</strong>g speeches; the grosser <strong>in</strong>sults I shall avoid.” This be<strong>in</strong>g clearly understood, Harris gave <strong>in</strong> his adhesion; and our start was fixed for early Wednesday morn<strong>in</strong>g.
Page 1:
Jerome K. Jerome Three</str
Page 4 and 5:
PUBLISHER’S ADVERTISEMENT. IT may
Page 6 and 7:
dle. Bad art may succeed for a time
Page 9 and 10:
CHAPTER I. Three I
Page 11 and 12:
— 11 — It had stopped beat<stro
Page 13 and 14:
— 13 — make me feel more anxiou
Page 15 and 16:
— 15 — I am told; and was event
Page 17 and 18:
— 17 — boat-loads of them; but
Page 19 and 20:
— 19 — CHAPTER II. Plans discus
Page 21 and 22:
— 21 — deep below the wav<stron
Page 23 and 24:
— 23 — comes, however, and all
Page 25 and 26:
— 25 — with a slice of lemon, w
Page 27 and 28:
— 27 — And then he would lift u
Page 29 and 30:
— 29 — blow, the nail would go
Page 31 and 32:
— 31 — whether you have ever se
Page 33 and 34:
— 33 — position or in</
Page 35 and 36:
— 35 — At the end of that trip
Page 37 and 38:
— 37 — little thin</str
Page 39 and 40:
— 39 — rid of them. He threw th
Page 41 and 42:
— 41 — “Ain
Page 43 and 44:
— 43 — “Stand still, can’t
Page 45 and 46:
— 45 — CHAPTER V. Mrs. P. arous
Page 47 and 48:
— 47 — fatalities, and the weat
Page 49 and 50:
— 49 — longed spell of grand we
Page 51 and 52:
— 51 — that Biggs’s boy (for
Page 53 and 54:
— 53 — should all know when we
Page 55 and 56:
— 55 — had two of Scotch cold h
Page 57 and 58:
— 57 — be that of the average h
Page 59 and 60:
— 59 — only the dug-up commonpl
Page 61 and 62:
— 61 — Harris, however, said he
Page 63 and 64:
— 63 — on until, at last, they
Page 65 and 66:
— 65 — CHAPTER VII. The river <
Page 67 and 68:
— 67 — worn in
Page 69 and 70:
— 69 — down on your — I mean
Page 71 and 72:
— 71 — about, makin</st
Page 73 and 74:
— 73 — of the river, and was ev
Page 75 and 76:
— 75 — by slouchin</str
Page 77 and 78:
— 77 — then try and make it up
Page 79 and 80:
— 79 — GENERAL CHORUS: ‘And h
Page 81 and 82:
— 81 — and, as the two young me
Page 83 and 84:
— 83 — of five min</str
Page 85 and 86:
— 85 — Montmorency set up a fur
Page 87 and 88:
— 87 — not. There may be tow-l<
Page 89 and 90:
— 89 — or his hat has dropped <
Page 91 and 92:
— 91 — did it, and the boat rus
Page 93 and 94:
— 93 — twenty min</stro
Page 95 and 96:
— 95 — tion; and then we both w
Page 97 and 98:
— 97 — CHAPTER X. Our first nig
Page 99 and 100:
— 99 — at Harris, began to stru
Page 101 and 102:
— 101 — and deep, and tender; s
Page 103 and 104:
— 103 — “What’s the matter,
Page 105 and 106:
— 105 — Sometimes, our pa<stron
Page 107 and 108:
— 107 — CHAPTER XI. How George,
Page 109 and 110:
— 109 — George listened, and a
Page 111 and 112:
— 111 — ing ba
Page 113 and 114:
— 113 — the eggs that had not s
Page 115 and 116:
— 115 — and there false John’
Page 117 and 118:
— 117 — it been a Richard there
Page 119 and 120:
— 119 — drawin
Page 121 and 122:
— 121 — King
Page 123 and 124:
— 123 — But Harris, who is an o
Page 125 and 126:
— 125 — joy that he fai
Page 127 and 128:
— 127 — It was George’s straw
Page 129 and 130:
— 129 — three fishermen sat; an
Page 131 and 132:
— 131 — CHAPTER XIII. Marlow.
Page 133 and 134:
— 133 — around them — the sof
Page 135 and 136:
— 135 — among themselves, and f
Page 137 and 138:
— 137 — of mutton from the hote
Page 139 and 140:
— 139 — and George would sit do
Page 141 and 142:
— 141 — We tried river water on
Page 143 and 144:
— 143 — scendin</strong
Page 145 and 146:
— 145 — river, bein</st
Page 147 and 148:
— 147 — which he evidently wish
Page 149 and 150:
— 149 — ing?
Page 151 and 152:
— 151 — get more and more piano
Page 153 and 154:
— 153 — We could not pass the w
Page 155 and 156:
— 155 — by “whisky,” or wha
Page 157 and 158:
— 157 — in my
Page 159 and 160:
— 159 — “No — no; don’t e
Page 161 and 162:
— 161 — prompt and graceful met
Page 163 and 164:
— 163 — crowded with nobility a
Page 165 and 166:
— 165 — spare pole with us. I c
Page 167 and 168:
— 167 — from behin</str
Page 169 and 170:
— 169 — adoptin</strong
Page 171 and 172:
— 171 — be contin</stro
Page 173 and 174:
— 173 — its dusky robe upon the
Page 175 and 176:
— 175 — The Angler’s Guide to
Page 177 and 178:
— 177 — “Oh, no; not now, sir
Page 179 and 180:
— 179 — “Ah!” said the old
Page 181 and 182:
— 181 — He said that br
Page 183 and 184:
— 183 — common practice up the
Page 185 and 186:
— 185 — There was a good deal o
Page 187 and 188: — 187 — and in
Page 189 and 190: — 189 — CHAPTER XIX. Oxford.
Page 191 and 192: — 191 — not to be afraid, but t
Page 193 and 194: — 193 — George took the fun mor
Page 195 and 196: — 195 — pression, unable to bea
Page 197 and 198: — 197 — lookin
Page 199: THREE MEN ON THE BUMMEL
Page 202 and 203: — 202 — George would make. A ba
Page 204 and 205: — 204 — and false-hearted enoug
Page 206 and 207: — 206 — to agree with him, —
Page 208 and 209: — 208 — with Ethelbertha by my
Page 210 and 211: — 210 — you might call it dull.
Page 212 and 213: — 212 — had the satisfaction of
Page 214 and 215: — 214 — CHAPTER II A delicate b
Page 216 and 217: — 216 — I wonder sometimes whet
Page 218 and 219: — 218 — Do you thin</st
Page 220 and 221: — 220 — “She’s goin
Page 222 and 223: — 222 — not goin</stron
Page 224 and 225: — 224 — In this way he sped mer
Page 226 and 227: — 226 — on? Very well, put it d
Page 228 and 229: — 228 — every fool has thought
Page 230 and 231: — 230 — rut it nipped you; it w
Page 232 and 233: — 232 — where, and out rolled a
Page 234 and 235: — 234 — It was the first th<str
Page 236 and 237: — 236 — isn’t; it’s a quest
Page 240 and 241: — 240 — CHAPTER IV Why Harris c
Page 242 and 243: — 242 — “Oh!” it says, “w
Page 244 and 245: — 244 — Harris’s new wheel. E
Page 246 and 247: — 246 — socks, it comes at you
Page 248 and 249: — 248 — and reflectin</
Page 250 and 251: — 250 — He would open his bag t
Page 252 and 253: — 252 — Taking
Page 254 and 255: — 254 — chose the very best sen
Page 256 and 257: — 256 — CHAPTER V A necessary d
Page 258 and 259: — 258 — wish here conscientious
Page 260 and 261: — 260 — We gave them hi
Page 262 and 263: — 262 — concernin</stro
Page 264 and 265: — 264 — route between London an
Page 266 and 267: — 266 — the camera for us, have
Page 268 and 269: — 268 — “Because the sun coul
Page 270 and 271: — 270 — I have dwelt upon this
Page 272 and 273: — 272 — “I am glad of that. A
Page 274 and 275: — 274 — is not our way, and the
Page 276 and 277: — 276 — regards him as an anima
Page 278 and 279: — 278 — utes water a stretch of
Page 280 and 281: — 280 — among them proceeded to
Page 282 and 283: — 282 — sleigh — do not pract
Page 284 and 285: — 284 — he turned his attention
Page 286 and 287: — 286 — in pub
Page 288 and 289:
— 288 — and bench at which he c
Page 290 and 291:
— 290 — The chief scandal of Dr
Page 292 and 293:
— 292 — some cushions for sale.
Page 294 and 295:
— 294 — “‘I have said it th
Page 296 and 297:
— 296 — CHAPTER VIII Mr. and Mi
Page 298 and 299:
— 298 — else in</strong
Page 300 and 301:
— 300 — Brahe, the astronomer,
Page 302 and 303:
— 302 — his mouth, and tear his
Page 304 and 305:
— 304 — only remember that <str
Page 306 and 307:
— 306 — He stood there with his
Page 308 and 309:
— 308 — George and I followed s
Page 310 and 311:
— 310 — CHAPTER IX Harris break
Page 312 and 313:
— 312 — “Whose is it?” he a
Page 314 and 315:
— 314 — (George says he did not
Page 316 and 317:
— 316 — horse was tired, and th
Page 318 and 319:
— 318 — to do, but must not: he
Page 320 and 321:
— 320 — He ignored my offer. He
Page 322 and 323:
— 322 — could speak English and
Page 324 and 325:
— 324 — lice could not do bette
Page 326 and 327:
— 326 — CHAPTER X Baden from th
Page 328 and 329:
— 328 — But at four o’clock <
Page 330 and 331:
— 330 — contin
Page 332 and 333:
— 332 — And the sun is always s
Page 334 and 335:
— 334 — idleness! How would you
Page 336 and 337:
— 336 — way? It’s disgraceful
Page 338 and 339:
— 338 — CHAPTER XI Black Forest
Page 340 and 341:
— 340 — stables, and wake up a
Page 342 and 343:
— 342 — “Don’t you th<stron
Page 344 and 345:
— 344 — upon it was due north o
Page 346 and 347:
— 346 — had origin</str
Page 348 and 349:
— 348 — unadorned truth, when I
Page 350 and 351:
— 350 — favoured in</st
Page 352 and 353:
— 352 — At a quarter to one, sa
Page 354 and 355:
— 354 — of those fools that wil
Page 356 and 357:
— 356 — was wasted. One felt so
Page 358 and 359:
— 358 — drown him, but he never
Page 360 and 361:
— 360 — “we had better make t
Page 362 and 363:
— 362 — him comfortable. At sup
Page 364 and 365:
— 364 — By spendin</str
Page 366 and 367:
— 366 — Cockneys — but the pi
Page 368 and 369:
— 368 — In the centre, fac<stro
Page 370 and 371:
— 370 — ment of the head or bod
Page 372 and 373:
— 372 — drink<
Page 374 and 375:
— 374 — his guest gets safely h
Page 376 and 377:
— 376 — “It will be i
Page 378 and 379:
— 378 — She pushed open the doo
Page 380 and 381:
— 380 — CHAPTER XIV Which is se
Page 382 and 383:
— 382 — in Ger
Page 384 and 385:
— 384 — who will go anywhere, a
Page 386 and 387:
— 386 — Possibly, he will have
Page 388 and 389:
— 388 — “Why not?” she aske
Page 390 and 391:
— 390 — a girl, she never under
Page 392:
INHALT THREE MEN IN A BOAT . . . .
show all

Three Men in a Boat / Three Men on the Bummel

You also want an ePaper? Increase the reach of your titles

Delete template?

Save as template?