Three Men in a Boat / Three Men on the Bummel

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— 300 — Brahe, the astronomer, who made the common mistake of th<strong>in</strong>k<strong>in</strong>g the earth, with its eleven hundred creeds and one humanity, the centre of the universe; but who otherwise observed the stars clearly. Through Prague’s dirty, palace-bordered alleys must have pressed often <strong>in</strong> hot haste bl<strong>in</strong>d Ziska and open-m<strong>in</strong>ded Wallenste<strong>in</strong> — they have dubbed him “The Hero” <strong>in</strong> Prague; and the town is honestly proud of hav<strong>in</strong>g owned him for citizen. In his gloomy palace <strong>in</strong> the Waldste<strong>in</strong>-Platz they show as a sacred spot the cab<strong>in</strong>et where he prayed, and seem to have persuaded themselves he really had a soul. Its steep, w<strong>in</strong>d<strong>in</strong>g ways must have been choked a dozen times, now by Sigismund’s fly<strong>in</strong>g legions, followed by fierce-kill<strong>in</strong>g Tarborites, and now by pale Protestants pursued by the victorious Catholics of Maximilian. Now Saxons, now Bavarians, and now French; now the sa<strong>in</strong>ts of Gustavus Adolphus, and now the steel fight<strong>in</strong>g mach<strong>in</strong>es of Frederick the Great, have thundered at its gates and fought upon its bridges. The Jews have always been an important feature of Prague. Occasionally they have assisted the Christians <strong>in</strong> their favourite occupation of slaughter<strong>in</strong>g one another, and the great flag suspended from the vault<strong>in</strong>g of the Altneuschule testifies to the courage with which they helped Catholic Ferd<strong>in</strong>and to resist the Protestant Swedes. The Prague Ghetto was one of the first to be established <strong>in</strong> Europe, and <strong>in</strong> the t<strong>in</strong>y synagogue, still stand<strong>in</strong>g, the Jew of Prague has worshipped for eight hundred years, his women folk devoutly listen<strong>in</strong>g, without, at the ear holes provided for them <strong>in</strong> the massive walls. A Jewish cemetery adjacent, “Bethchajim, or the House of Life,” seems as though it were burst<strong>in</strong>g with its dead. With<strong>in</strong> its narrow acre it was the law of centuries that here or nowhere must the bones of Israel rest. So the worn and broken tombstones lie piled <strong>in</strong> close confusion, as though tossed and tumbled by the struggl<strong>in</strong>g host beneath. The Ghetto walls have long been levelled, but the liv<strong>in</strong>g Jews of Prague still cl<strong>in</strong>g to their foetid lanes, though these
— 301 — are be<strong>in</strong>g rapidly replaced by f<strong>in</strong>e new streets that promise to eventually transform this quarter <strong>in</strong>to the handsomest part of the town. At Dresden they advised us not to talk German <strong>in</strong> Prague. For years racial animosity between the German m<strong>in</strong>ority and the Czech majority has raged throughout Bohemia, and to be mistaken for a German <strong>in</strong> certa<strong>in</strong> streets of Prague is <strong>in</strong>convenient to a man whose stay<strong>in</strong>g powers <strong>in</strong> a race are not what once they were. However, we did talk German <strong>in</strong> certa<strong>in</strong> streets <strong>in</strong> Prague; it was a case of talk<strong>in</strong>g German or noth<strong>in</strong>g. The Czech dialect is said to be of great antiquity and of highly scientific cultivation. Its alphabet conta<strong>in</strong>s forty-two letters, suggestive to a stranger of Ch<strong>in</strong>ese. It is not a language to be picked up <strong>in</strong> a hurry. We decided that on the whole there would be less risk to our constitution <strong>in</strong> keep<strong>in</strong>g to German, and as a matter of fact no harm came to us. The explanation I can only surmise. The Praguer is an exceed<strong>in</strong>gly acute person; some subtle falsity of accent, some slight grammatical <strong>in</strong>accuracy, may have crept <strong>in</strong>to our German, reveal<strong>in</strong>g to him the fact that, <strong>in</strong> spite of all appearances to the contrary, we were no true-born Deutscher. I do not assert this; I put it forward as a possibility. To avoid unnecessary danger, however, we did our sight-see<strong>in</strong>g with the aid of a guide. No guide I have ever come across is perfect. This one had two dist<strong>in</strong>ct fail<strong>in</strong>gs. His English was decidedly weak. Indeed, it was not English at all. I do not know what you would call it. It was not altogether his fault; he had learnt English from a Scotch lady. I understand Scotch fairly well — to keep abreast of modern English literature this is necessary, — but to understand broad Scotch talked with a Sclavonic accent, occasionally relieved by German modifications, taxes the <strong>in</strong>telligence. For the first hour it was difficult to rid one’s self of the conviction that the man was chok<strong>in</strong>g. Every moment we expected him to die on our hands. In the course of the morn<strong>in</strong>g we grew accustomed to him, and rid ourselves of the <strong>in</strong>st<strong>in</strong>ct to throw him on his back every time he opened
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Jerome K. Jerome Three</str
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PUBLISHER’S ADVERTISEMENT. IT may
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dle. Bad art may succeed for a time
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CHAPTER I. Three I
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— 11 — It had stopped beat<stro
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— 13 — make me feel more anxiou
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— 15 — I am told; and was event
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— 17 — boat-loads of them; but
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— 19 — CHAPTER II. Plans discus
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— 21 — deep below the wav<stron
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— 23 — comes, however, and all
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— 25 — with a slice of lemon, w
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— 27 — And then he would lift u
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— 29 — blow, the nail would go
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— 31 — whether you have ever se
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— 33 — position or in</
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— 35 — At the end of that trip
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— 37 — little thin</str
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— 39 — rid of them. He threw th
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— 41 — “Ain
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— 43 — “Stand still, can’t
Page 45 and 46:
— 45 — CHAPTER V. Mrs. P. arous
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— 47 — fatalities, and the weat
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— 49 — longed spell of grand we
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— 51 — that Biggs’s boy (for
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— 53 — should all know when we
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— 55 — had two of Scotch cold h
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— 57 — be that of the average h
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— 59 — only the dug-up commonpl
Page 61 and 62:
— 61 — Harris, however, said he
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— 63 — on until, at last, they
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— 65 — CHAPTER VII. The river <
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— 67 — worn in
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— 69 — down on your — I mean
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— 71 — about, makin</st
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— 73 — of the river, and was ev
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— 75 — by slouchin</str
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— 77 — then try and make it up
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— 79 — GENERAL CHORUS: ‘And h
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— 81 — and, as the two young me
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— 83 — of five min</str
Page 85 and 86:
— 85 — Montmorency set up a fur
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— 87 — not. There may be tow-l<
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— 89 — or his hat has dropped <
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— 91 — did it, and the boat rus
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— 93 — twenty min</stro
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— 95 — tion; and then we both w
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— 97 — CHAPTER X. Our first nig
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— 99 — at Harris, began to stru
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— 101 — and deep, and tender; s
Page 103 and 104:
— 103 — “What’s the matter,
Page 105 and 106:
— 105 — Sometimes, our pa<stron
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— 107 — CHAPTER XI. How George,
Page 109 and 110:
— 109 — George listened, and a
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— 111 — ing ba
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— 113 — the eggs that had not s
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— 115 — and there false John’
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— 117 — it been a Richard there
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— 119 — drawin
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— 121 — King
Page 123 and 124:
— 123 — But Harris, who is an o
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— 125 — joy that he fai
Page 127 and 128:
— 127 — It was George’s straw
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— 129 — three fishermen sat; an
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— 131 — CHAPTER XIII. Marlow.
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— 133 — around them — the sof
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— 135 — among themselves, and f
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— 137 — of mutton from the hote
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— 139 — and George would sit do
Page 141 and 142:
— 141 — We tried river water on
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— 143 — scendin</strong
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— 145 — river, bein</st
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— 147 — which he evidently wish
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— 149 — ing?
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— 151 — get more and more piano
Page 153 and 154:
— 153 — We could not pass the w
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— 155 — by “whisky,” or wha
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— 157 — in my
Page 159 and 160:
— 159 — “No — no; don’t e
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— 161 — prompt and graceful met
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— 163 — crowded with nobility a
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— 165 — spare pole with us. I c
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— 167 — from behin</str
Page 169 and 170:
— 169 — adoptin</strong
Page 171 and 172:
— 171 — be contin</stro
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— 173 — its dusky robe upon the
Page 175 and 176:
— 175 — The Angler’s Guide to
Page 177 and 178:
— 177 — “Oh, no; not now, sir
Page 179 and 180:
— 179 — “Ah!” said the old
Page 181 and 182:
— 181 — He said that br
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— 183 — common practice up the
Page 185 and 186:
— 185 — There was a good deal o
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— 187 — and in
Page 189 and 190:
— 189 — CHAPTER XIX. Oxford.
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— 191 — not to be afraid, but t
Page 193 and 194:
— 193 — George took the fun mor
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— 195 — pression, unable to bea
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— 197 — lookin
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THREE MEN ON THE BUMMEL
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— 202 — George would make. A ba
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— 204 — and false-hearted enoug
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— 206 — to agree with him, —
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— 208 — with Ethelbertha by my
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— 210 — you might call it dull.
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— 212 — had the satisfaction of
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— 214 — CHAPTER II A delicate b
Page 216 and 217:
— 216 — I wonder sometimes whet
Page 218 and 219:
— 218 — Do you thin</st
Page 220 and 221:
— 220 — “She’s goin
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— 222 — not goin</stron
Page 224 and 225:
— 224 — In this way he sped mer
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— 226 — on? Very well, put it d
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— 228 — every fool has thought
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— 230 — rut it nipped you; it w
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— 232 — where, and out rolled a
Page 234 and 235:
— 234 — It was the first th<str
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— 236 — isn’t; it’s a quest
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— 238 — lers. It commenced “O
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— 240 — CHAPTER IV Why Harris c
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— 242 — “Oh!” it says, “w
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— 244 — Harris’s new wheel. E
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— 246 — socks, it comes at you
Page 248 and 249:
— 248 — and reflectin</
Page 250 and 251: — 250 — He would open his bag t
Page 252 and 253: — 252 — Taking
Page 254 and 255: — 254 — chose the very best sen
Page 256 and 257: — 256 — CHAPTER V A necessary d
Page 258 and 259: — 258 — wish here conscientious
Page 260 and 261: — 260 — We gave them hi
Page 262 and 263: — 262 — concernin</stro
Page 264 and 265: — 264 — route between London an
Page 266 and 267: — 266 — the camera for us, have
Page 268 and 269: — 268 — “Because the sun coul
Page 270 and 271: — 270 — I have dwelt upon this
Page 272 and 273: — 272 — “I am glad of that. A
Page 274 and 275: — 274 — is not our way, and the
Page 276 and 277: — 276 — regards him as an anima
Page 278 and 279: — 278 — utes water a stretch of
Page 280 and 281: — 280 — among them proceeded to
Page 282 and 283: — 282 — sleigh — do not pract
Page 284 and 285: — 284 — he turned his attention
Page 286 and 287: — 286 — in pub
Page 288 and 289: — 288 — and bench at which he c
Page 290 and 291: — 290 — The chief scandal of Dr
Page 292 and 293: — 292 — some cushions for sale.
Page 294 and 295: — 294 — “‘I have said it th
Page 296 and 297: — 296 — CHAPTER VIII Mr. and Mi
Page 298 and 299: — 298 — else in</strong
Page 302 and 303: — 302 — his mouth, and tear his
Page 304 and 305: — 304 — only remember that <str
Page 306 and 307: — 306 — He stood there with his
Page 308 and 309: — 308 — George and I followed s
Page 310 and 311: — 310 — CHAPTER IX Harris break
Page 312 and 313: — 312 — “Whose is it?” he a
Page 314 and 315: — 314 — (George says he did not
Page 316 and 317: — 316 — horse was tired, and th
Page 318 and 319: — 318 — to do, but must not: he
Page 320 and 321: — 320 — He ignored my offer. He
Page 322 and 323: — 322 — could speak English and
Page 324 and 325: — 324 — lice could not do bette
Page 326 and 327: — 326 — CHAPTER X Baden from th
Page 328 and 329: — 328 — But at four o’clock <
Page 330 and 331: — 330 — contin
Page 332 and 333: — 332 — And the sun is always s
Page 334 and 335: — 334 — idleness! How would you
Page 336 and 337: — 336 — way? It’s disgraceful
Page 338 and 339: — 338 — CHAPTER XI Black Forest
Page 340 and 341: — 340 — stables, and wake up a
Page 342 and 343: — 342 — “Don’t you th<stron
Page 344 and 345: — 344 — upon it was due north o
Page 346 and 347: — 346 — had origin</str
Page 348 and 349: — 348 — unadorned truth, when I
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— 350 — favoured in</st
Page 352 and 353:
— 352 — At a quarter to one, sa
Page 354 and 355:
— 354 — of those fools that wil
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— 356 — was wasted. One felt so
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— 358 — drown him, but he never
Page 360 and 361:
— 360 — “we had better make t
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— 362 — him comfortable. At sup
Page 364 and 365:
— 364 — By spendin</str
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— 366 — Cockneys — but the pi
Page 368 and 369:
— 368 — In the centre, fac<stro
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— 370 — ment of the head or bod
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— 372 — drink<
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— 374 — his guest gets safely h
Page 376 and 377:
— 376 — “It will be i
Page 378 and 379:
— 378 — She pushed open the doo
Page 380 and 381:
— 380 — CHAPTER XIV Which is se
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— 382 — in Ger
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— 384 — who will go anywhere, a
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— 386 — Possibly, he will have
Page 388 and 389:
— 388 — “Why not?” she aske
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— 390 — a girl, she never under
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INHALT THREE MEN IN A BOAT . . . .
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Three Men in a Boat / Three Men on the Bummel

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