Three Men in a Boat / Three Men on the Bummel
Three Men in a Boat / Three Men on the Bummel
Three Men in a Boat / Three Men on the Bummel
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— 67 —<br />
worn <str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g> a boat, and not merely under a glass-case. It utterly<br />
spoils an excursi<strong>on</strong> if you have folk <str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g> <strong>the</strong> boat who are th<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>k<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g<br />
all <strong>the</strong> time a good deal more of <strong>the</strong>ir dress than of <strong>the</strong> trip.<br />
It was my misfortune <strong>on</strong>ce to go for a water picnic with two<br />
ladies of this k<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>d. We did have a lively time!<br />
They were both beautifully got up — all lace and silky stuff,<br />
and flowers, and ribb<strong>on</strong>s, and da<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>ty shoes, and light gloves.<br />
But <strong>the</strong>y were dressed for a photographic studio, not for a river<br />
picnic. They were <strong>the</strong> “boat<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g costumes” of a French fashi<strong>on</strong>plate.<br />
It was ridiculous, fool<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g about <str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g> <strong>the</strong>m anywhere near<br />
real earth, air, and water.<br />
The first th<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g was that <strong>the</strong>y thought <strong>the</strong> boat was not clean.<br />
We dusted all <strong>the</strong> seats for <strong>the</strong>m, and <strong>the</strong>n assured <strong>the</strong>m that it<br />
was, but <strong>the</strong>y didn’t believe us. One of <strong>the</strong>m rubbed <strong>the</strong> cushi<strong>on</strong><br />
with <strong>the</strong> foref<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>ger of her glove, and showed <strong>the</strong> result to<br />
<strong>the</strong> o<strong>the</strong>r, and <strong>the</strong>y both sighed, and sat down, with <strong>the</strong> air of<br />
early Christian martyrs try<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g to make <strong>the</strong>mselves comfortable<br />
up aga<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>st <strong>the</strong> stake. You are liable to occasi<strong>on</strong>ally splash<br />
a little when scull<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g, and it appeared that a drop of water<br />
ru<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>ed those costumes. The mark never came out, and a sta<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g><br />
was left <strong>on</strong> <strong>the</strong> dress for ever.<br />
I was stroke. I did my best. I fea<strong>the</strong>red some two feet high,<br />
and I paused at <strong>the</strong> end of each stroke to let <strong>the</strong> blades drip<br />
before return<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g <strong>the</strong>m, and I picked out a smooth bit of water<br />
to drop <strong>the</strong>m <str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>to aga<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g> each time. (Bow said, after a while,<br />
that he did not feel himself a sufficiently accomplished oarsman<br />
to pull with me, but that he would sit still, if I would allow<br />
him, and study my stroke. He said it <str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>terested him.) But,<br />
notwithstand<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g all this, and try as I would, I could not help an<br />
occasi<strong>on</strong>al flicker of water from go<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g over those dresses.<br />
The girls did not compla<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>, but <strong>the</strong>y huddled up close toge<strong>the</strong>r,<br />
and set <strong>the</strong>ir lips firm, and every time a drop touched<br />
<strong>the</strong>m, <strong>the</strong>y visibly shrank and shuddered. It was a noble sight<br />
to see <strong>the</strong>m suffer<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g thus <str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g> silence, but it unnerved me altoge<strong>the</strong>r.<br />
I am too sensitive. I got wild and fitful <str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g> my row<str<strong>on</strong>g>in</str<strong>on</strong>g>g,<br />
and splashed more and more, <strong>the</strong> harder I tried not to.