Small Talk
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98 . the fine art of small talk<br />
among all the players and keep the ball inbounds for play<br />
to continue. This requires focusing on the ball at all<br />
times and passing it around. Some of the people in your<br />
group may be reluctant to receive the ball for the same<br />
reasons that you were—they’re shy, feel like their lives<br />
are too ordinary, don’t enjoy the attention, et cetera. It’s<br />
up to you to help them, or the game will fall apart.<br />
One of the easiest ways to start or keep a conversation<br />
going is to compliment another person. Finding<br />
something nice to say about someone is usually not that<br />
difficult. Surely they have something to like about them.<br />
Being forthright enough to tell them what you admire<br />
about them makes an immediate connection between the<br />
two of you. With connection comes its etymological<br />
cousin, conversation. An authentic compliment makes<br />
the other person feel good about both of you, and that<br />
enhances the rapport, making conversation easier. The<br />
key is that your compliment is genuine, so select something<br />
that you can truly support. No matter what you<br />
choose, it will fall into one of these three categories: appearance,<br />
possessions, or behavior. Mark Twain once said<br />
that a good compliment lasted him sixty days!<br />
Prior to my wedding, I had a conversation with my
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