Small Talk

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134 . the fine art of small talk the instructors might best use small talk. I was grouped with a family from Alabama who had never even seen snow before. As the lesson progressed, the instructor noticed how cautiously I was skiing—I was even more reticent than the Alabamians! The instructor decided that I must have had weak quad muscles. He showed me some strengthening exercises to solve that problem. The real problem was that the adviser/instructor diagnosed the difficulty without even consulting me. He had no idea that I am an avid runner; my quad strength is fine, thank you very much! It was my terror at standing at an altitude of over eleven thousand feet that practically paralyzed me. Had the instructor bothered to find that out, he would have given me a much more effective skiing lesson. Had he dug deeper, he would have discovered that his premature analysis of my problem was completely incorrect. Physicians are among the most notorious advisers. They frequently interrupt the patient and diagnose the problem before the patient has a chance to tell the whole story. Frequently, the patient doesn’t get to the heart of the matter until the doctor has his hand on the doorknob, about to exit the room. If the doctor would sit and
crimes and misdemeanors . 135 listen to the patient completely before rendering an opinion, the appointment would be much more successful. Each would enjoy reduced frustration and a better outcome! Does the following conversation seem familiar? Steve: How was your day? Debra: I had a rough day. Steve: What’s going on? Debra: I have a mound of paperwork to complete for a proposal, and I haven’t packed for my trip to Seattle tomorrow. I am really behind. Steve: Haven’t I told you a million times, Deb? If you would just work smarter instead of harder. You should let your assistant prepare the proposals, and why didn’t you pack over the weekend instead of waiting till the last minute? You should plan better.
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Contents Preface ix chapter 1 What
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Preface When I first got into the b
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preface . xi didn’t know how to k
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preface . xiii commentary on some f
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preface . xv to present themselves.
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preface . xvii 4. I go to at least
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2 Get Over Your Mom’s Good Intent
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6 Hearing Aids and Listening Device
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15 Holiday Party Savvy Survive the
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Acknowledgments The need for additi
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Small Talk

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