Small Talk

38 . the fine art of small talk
a bite to eat, someone sitting alone at a table, or the one
crossing the room unescorted. More often than not, these
people are relieved to have someone else initiate the conversation.
Believe me, I’ve been around plenty of these
folks—they are intelligent, interesting, welcoming...
and shy. They are in the same spot you were before you
decided to improve your skills. If you take the conversational
plunge, they will herald you as a savior.
Make it a point to look around a room when you first
enter it. It doesn’t matter what the event is—a meeting,
a reception, a baby shower, a party, even a family
reunion—there are people standing alone or sitting at an
empty table. Don’t wait; make eye contact and be the
first to smile. You’ll net a smile back, and you’ll put the
other person at ease, the way any fine host would! People
will reward you by being attentive listeners and giving
you a chance to practice your icebreakers.
Not only are icebreakers a good way to start a conversation,
but some of the statements are accompanied
by questions you can ask to keep the ball rolling. Don’t
use a statement alone. Using a statement by itself is like
lobbing the conversational ball blindfolded, not knowing
where it will land or whether it will get tossed back.